Corrections

I must change what I say. I say, "A Hex upon the Unknown rash hex!" We discovered that my MS probably does not have the chicken pox after all. When I called the dr. office on Thursday morning, I had to describe the rash as more splotchy than pimply. He had no fever. Having just finished a round of antibiotics for his ear infection, my husband thought perhaps it was a reaction to the medicine. The nurse decided to call it "a rash of unknown origin." She said it is probably viral. Today, it has faded quite a bit and didn't really bother him (although both little boys have developed a croupy sounding cough - so who knows what is on its way).

And, as for missing the Parent's Day Out this week. Well, perhaps my fall from the stool was God's way of saying, "Here's your little lie-around after all!" I spent a good long time on the couch, waiting for the ibuprofen to kick in. Then, today, my husband (bless him) allowed me to take a nap with my YS in the morning. I'm still sore today, but thankful that nothing was broken. I did take a moment to talk my MS through calling 9-1-1 if anything should render me unconscious in the future. We'll have to wait and see if that was such a good idea. I did explain that it is only for EMERGENCIES.

Also, I recalled that I did indeed take my wedding ring off on a few other occasions. I removed it for the last three or four months of my pregnancies (for fear my fingers would swell - yet, they never did).

A Comment, Not a Post

This is really a very lengthy comment to Cardiogirl's post today at www.cardiogirl.net :

Did I really just read my name in your post, Cardiogirl? Even if I'm not a celebrity, I feel like one now. O.K., let me qualify that statement. Physically, I DON'T feel like one. I went downstairs this morning and stood on a small wooden craft stool to reach something high (I'm short - there's a detail for you - only 5'4") and the darned stool broke beneath my weight and I landed on my wrist and tailbone. I was thrilled to discover that I could get up and could walk. I headed upstairs to lie down on the couch nearer to my sons. All day, I have been plagued by thoughts of what would have happened if my head had hit the metal shelves behind me and knocked me unconscious.

Thanks for making me feel special. You asked what shampoo I use? I use whatever shampoo I can get for free at Walgreens. For the moment, that is Garnier Fructis (I've actually gotten three bottles for free in the last two months). My husband hates it. He uses Tresemme.

I have a cheap watch that I keep replacing because I love it and get so many comments on it. I found it at Target and bought it twice. But, the present one, I bought for just $5 at Kohl's. It was $20, marked down to $15, and I had a $10 off any purchase coupon since we just had one open in a neighboring town. What is distinctive about it, is that it matches the shape of my wedding ring (ah, there's another post, because my wedding ring was chosen by my husband's ex-fiance). The top part of the band curves to the left of the face and the bottom part curves to the right.

Now, wedding rings. I keep mine on all the time (except for a few years there, when we were separated and even though back together, I felt my husband hated me, so I couldn't bring myself to wear it). I don't understand it, but my husband takes his off all the time (and loses it, I should say). A few weeks ago, my MS brought it to me and said he found it at the back of the couch.

We always manage to find it, which I'm grateful for, because even though it is a simple band, I had something special engraved inside it. He'll take it off at work to put lotion on his hands and then slip it into his bookbag/briefcase. He'll set it on the table. One time I found it and feigned ignorance when he explained he was looking for it. I don't think I let him stew too long (maybe a day), but he's such a careful guy that this really seems out of character for him. I suppose I'll use that, next time I need him to cut me some slack for getting my foot stuck in my purse strap and almost losing the cash carelessly stuffed into my purse. Ha!

I drive a silver Nissan Quest. It took me a while to get used to it, because I had always driven cars. Unfortunately, I had recently driven my car into a telephone pole on the short trip from our home in DeKalb to the school (two and a half blocks away). My husband picked it out without me, while visiting my in-laws. At first, it felt like a tank. Now, I love the roominess and the ease with which I can get the two little boys into their car seats.

But, I am very much like you, Cardiogirl. I'm curious about little details in people's lives. I love to eavesdrop. I, too, look in people's windows. We had friends who lived around the corner from us in DeKalb and after they moved to a new house, I found myself always looking in the window to see what changes the new owner had made in the front room. When my son went back to DeKalb to visit a friend, he actually went to our old house and looked in the windows to see what changes had been made and he filled me in on all the details.

My husband, is more like Mr. C., in this respect. In fact, I was just telling him yesterday that "people must think I'm such a lazy-bones because I stop at the end of the driveway, open the back hatch, put the two garbage cans in and then drive up the driveway to our garage where I enter halfway and un-load the garbage cans before pulling all the way into the garage." He laughed at me and said "Who in the world could possibly be watching you? And who would want to stop and see what you are doing? And who would care if you ARE a lazy-bones?" He marvelled that I would worry about the thoughts of a passing motorist! I guess I worry because it is the kind of thing I would see and then later think about. Ha!

I love blogs because I get to eavesdrop on other people's lives and learn things about them. I do love the fact that I know lots of little details about you, Cardiogirl, and yet we've never met. I don't know if our personalities would mesh or not, but I love learning all these things about you and hearing what you are thinking about on a daily basis. I love that you have made me your friend, sight-unseen. I love that you wonder about details in my life. I know that you are a kindred soul. Perhaps, because we are both writers.

One of my favorite quotes is one I gleaned from a writing book way back when I was in high school. I used it in the preface to a paper I had written about Charles Dickens. It was taken from Rudolf Flesch and A.H. Lass's book, A New Guide to Better Writing.

"You have to go through the world with your eyes and ears wide open and soak up experiences like a sponge. Day and night, you have to be a reporter on the job, and your mind has to take down in shorthand whatever happens around you. Impossible? No, not quite. There are people like that, men and women who seem to be natural journalists or novelists, born writers whose minds automatically store up what they see and hear."

So, Cardiogirl, it is just the natural journalist in you that makes you crave these details. It is what makes you so good at what you do. Just another reason I like you.

I Say "Apox Upon the Pox"

Tonight, my MS has frustrated me again (not that it is his fault, but really couldn't these things have popped out tomorrow night?). He has the chickenpox. Yes, YS just experienced the pox, too, a few weeks ago, after receiving the chickenpox vaccine. He was feverish and wimpery for days, but only had a day or two of a very mild rash.

MS did receive the vaccine when he was a little over a year, so I'm hoping it means he will only have a mild case. However, he already has more spots than the youngest one had. Hence, he will not be able to attend his Parent's Day Out Program tomorrow morning.

Thursday is one of my favorite days of the week. My MS loves to don his backpack and grab his lunch and head to "school." At one point, in discussion with his teacher, she had commented that he really should be bumped up to a higher class (he is in the 2 year old class because his birthday fell in September). I think she was concerned that I might think he was not learning enough. I laughed and explained that, unfortunately my decision to enroll him in the program was more about me than about him. He does need the socialization, but, more importantly, I need four hours each week away from him. The fact that he has so much fun there is just an added bonus.

Oh, how I dread giving up my four quiet hours without him. My YS is usually pretty good to take a morning nap or at least quietly babble in his crib. This is the time when I get the most accomplished at home. And some Thursdays, I just take a nap, too, or read and enjoy the silence. There will be none of that and I feel like whining like a child. Aw, why can't he just go to school anyway. He'll probably be his exuberant self, hardly aware of the rash which is covering his body and which is ... alright, CONTAGIOUS!

The only thoughts saving me at this point are:

1. Experts suggest having the child soak in a cool to warm bath for a half hour or hour every three hours (and he loves to linger in the bath).
2. I actually have a haircut and highlights appointment on Saturday afternoon, so I will still get two hours of quiet and pampering this weekend. Thank the Lord.

Link for No Beaks Interview

I had planned on posting my interview with Mr. W. and Domb Squad here on my blog, but alas, it turned out to be really long and I had something else I wanted to post tonight. So, I will merely link to the interview. You can find it at http://nobeaks.typepad.com/no_beaks/2008/02/the-interview.html.



It was interesting to interview them, even though I don't have a lot in common with them. I still hope to interview Leah at www.ciboulette.blogspot.com. I believe she said that her interviewer hadn't sent questions yet. Mr. W. also had some difficulties with this experiment. He tried to contact the two individuals he agreed to interview, but they never responded. I suppose an experiment is only as good as the participants involved.

Sensitive Soul

I'm often exhausted by my MS. He is a talker. Indeed, lots of days he talks the whole day long. His verbal skills have always been very strong. He spoke in sentences far earlier than my ES. He hears a word or phrase and it quickly becomes part of his vocabulary. On several occasions, I have discovered particular words or phrases that I tend to overuse unconsciously. Suddenly, he will begin using them constantly and a lightbulb clicks in my head - "goodness, I do use that word a lot!"

Last week, I had to drive him to the ER late in the evening. He complained that his ear hurt. Then, his complaints became whimpers, then sobs, then almost screams. I think they tried to see us quickly, if only to quiet him. It was the first time I had ever heard him say, "I hurt so bad, I'm going to die." I thought it unusual, but then, he is very verbal.

Once he received the pain-killer and antibiotic, he transformed into his ever-loquacious self, telling her that he IS SPIDERMAN and he fights crime. He then informed her of his last visit there, when they had drawn blood by wrapping a rubber band around his arm and cutting off his circulation (he only knows this word because he had become familiar with rubberbands and circulation already at home!). The attending nurse was amazed. She looked at me and said, "And how many do you have?" I replied, "Three ... boys ... but they're not all this talkative!" She said, "He's a kick!"

But I'm learning that he's not just verbally astute, he is also very sensitive and impressionable. Tonight, he was downstairs playing with Daddy and little brother. When I heard crying, I assumed one of them had gotten hurt. However, ten minutes later, I headed downstairs to find him rocking on Daddy's lap and still crying.

My husband explained that they had been talking about his great-grandparents (since we live in my husband's grandmother's house) and he explained that it isn't their house anymore because they died. He went on to explain that some day Grandma and Grandpa will get old and die, too. I think he explained this because my FIL has been ill for some time (and at Christmas was even temporarily in a nursing home for care after another surgery).

Apparently, my MS asked "Are you and Mommy going to die?" My husband told him that everyone eventually dies. At that point, he lost it. He began to worry that we are going to die. We both tried to tell him that we intend to stay here and take care of him as long as we can and that we take care of ourselves because we want to be with him for a long time. His tears did finally subside. Although, he mentioned it one more time before he went to sleep this evening.

I suppose, without really realizing it, I am the one who introduced this topic to him. In mid-September of 2007, I found Boothe Farley's blog at www.conorbootheandgirls.blogspot.com and began to pray for their daughter, Copeland, who was born with Trisomy-18. A few times my MS was nearby, and we began to pray together for Copeland. Every night, he would include her in his prayers.

Copeland went to be with the Lord on September 26, 2007 and I cried. My MS saw my tears and we prayed that night for her family and that God would take care of her in heaven. Without any prompting from me, he continued to mention Copeland in his prayers for a few more weeks.

I can't really remember if he was around when I learned of another tragic death, when Julian Avery (whose caring page is called "Julian's World") passed away about a month ago. However, I'm starting to think that he is more aware of my emotional responses to these deaths than I have realized. I'm beginning to wonder how you handle a sensitive soul.

I have always been sensitive. My mother used to tell me that I "wear my emotions on my sleeve." Even when I was younger, I realized that I felt things deeply, perhaps more deeply than others. I know that I have a very difficult time letting go of friendships. To this day, I agonize over several friendships that have soured or simply disappeared without explanation. So, I am coming to see that my MS and I share a similar emotional make-up. I have to say that scares me, somewhat. My emotional excesses have been hard to deal with.

I want to nurture his sensitive nature. I love the fact that he might grow up to be a very sensitive and caring man. Surely, there are not enough of those in this world. Yet, I don't want to burden him with things like "death" if he is not old enough to emotionally handle this.

I will pray for extra wisdom in raising him. I will watch my words and actions more closely. I don't want to say that I will shield him from knowledge of things that are difficult, but I do want to be more intentional about what I allow him to over-hear or take in. I have already witnessed the depth of his compassion and love and know that he is going to be, like me, (whether I like it or not) someone who feels things deeply.

Is My Paranoia Warranted?

I've been feeling paranoid today. My paranoia comes from several sources. This may be a winding road, but stay with me.

On Saturday night, I watched "Runaway Jury," a movie based on John Grisham's bestseller, starring John Cusack, Gene Hackman and Dustin Hoffman. We had started this movie a few weeks back, but my husband didn't like it within the first 20 minutes (of course, this could be due to the fact that the first two actors mentioned are not his favorites). I, myself, was interested in watching it because I may be called upon to serve jury duty this year.

Normally, I would welcome such an event. In fact, when I was in London, I attended a court case one day as an observer. It was fascinating. But, I have to say, when I received the letter informing me that I might serve jury duty, it was less-than-welcome news.

They clearly state that under no circumstances are you to bring children with you. Yet, lack of child care is not a valid excuse to get out of jury duty. I really stressed for a few days over this, thinking "how in the world can I be called away for jury duty? My husband works. I have no family nearby. I don't even know of anyone in this area whom I would trust to watch my children to allow me an evening out, let alone asking them to care for my kids every day while I serve jury duty for who knows how long.

My husband finally convinced me that my panic was borrowing trouble from tomorrow. It doesn't say that I will definitely be called for jury duty, just that my name is on the 2008 pool of names. And, I probably won't be called upon to serve on a case anything like the one profiled in the movie I just watched.

Still, that movie has my head reeling. It was very suspenseful and, I thought, well-done. It is the story of an important court case, where jury consultants are being paid big bucks to secure the outcome they desire. What they didn't expect was John Cusack's character, who has his own agenda and is going to try to buy either side in exchange for giving them the desired verdict. Clear to the end, you don't know which side is going to prevail. Throughout the movie, they show how people can find out all kinds of things about members of a jury and use this information to manipulate them.

Plus, I'm listening to a riveting book right now by Khaled Housseni, called A Thousand Splendid Suns. I have been shocked at how difficult it is to listen to. It details many historical events over the last three decades in Afghanistan and I find myself grieving over the conditions women live under in such countries. Moreover, I'm wondering if Housseni fears for his life for publishing this book.

Then, Cardiogirl at http://www.cardiogirl.net had some glitches with her computer service and missed a day. She is a member of Blog 365, so this bothered her. She finally posted a humorous post blaming Comcast not only for her computer service problems, but for every problem of the day. Wouldn't we all like to have one entity we could just place all the blame upon? I know I would.

In the comments to Cardiogirl's blog, I noticed that Guilty Secret at http://www.gs-whatnext.blogspot.com (who is British) said she is going to start using Cardiogirl's phrase, "I blame Comcast," even though nobody will have a clue what she is going on about (since they don't have Comcast in England). Ha! That made me chuckle.

But, Cardiogirl also received two comments from ... Comcast ... on her blog post. Cardiogirl is far more computer or blog-savvy than I am and she checked to see how he found her complaining post. Apparently, he had googled "comcast dog" (???) and wound up at Cardiogirl's site.

So, this has me paranoid. The government recently interrupted my boring life by adding some new stresses ... because they are the government and they CAN. I'm being intentionally vague here. I'm too paranoid to blog my true feelings about this recent turn of events because now I'm wondering who is out there logging onto my blog to find out every little detail about me. If I complain about the government, is there someone googling on-line to discover which bloggers are providing dissenting comments.

Of course, we don't live in Afghanistan and I dont' expect to have my fingers chopped off. However, I'm still feeling a bit spooked and paranoid. Big Brother is not too far-fetched an idea. The internet is allowing so many people to publish their own opinions and thoughts on things. Could this one day be used against us? I don't know. What do you think? Should I be worried?

Happy 8th Birthday, Andre

While I was living in London, shortly after completing college, I met the only individual I have ever known who celebrates a birthday on Leap Day! His name was Andre' and he was celebrating his 3rd birthday the year I met him. He was turning 12.

So, this leap year, he will be celebrating on his actual birthday for the 8th time - even though he is turning 32. At 12, Andre' was a spunky, clever, funny individual and I enjoyed spending time with him and his older sister, Catherine (they lived down the street from Sarah, whose family hosted me for Christmas that year). They kindly invited me, along with Sarah's family, for breakfast on Easter morning, my last morning in England for that wonderful extended visit.

Thinking of Andre' recently, also got me thinking about golden birthdays. I didn't know about golden birthdays in time to celebrate my golden birthday. When I headed over to Wikipedia to read their definition, I learned that the golden birthday is not known or celebrated everywhere.
It read:

"One's champagne birthday, also called a golden birthday, is the day when the age someone turns is the same as the day in the month he or she was born. It is also common for the birthday individual to have champagne, thus champagne birthday. For example, someone born on January 31st would celebrate his or her golden birthday when he or she turns 31. According to the Dictionary of American Regional English, this meaning is most prevalent in Wisconsin and eastern Minnesota, although it is used elsewhere. "


Poor Andre'! He will never officially celebrate his "champagne birthday/golden birthday." He would have to turn 29 on the 29th. Impossible! On his 29th birthday, there was no 29th of February. By the time he celebrates his birthday for the 29th time on the actual date, he would be 116. He's a lawyer; he'll never make it to 116. And if he did, well then, he'll really be 116, won't he, and not 29!


Hope your day was special, Andre'!