My laptop was in the shop for repairs all last week. As the one device in our home with Microsoft Word, it's the only place I can work on my novels. This evoked mixed feelings. Even though the inability to work on my writing brought frustration, it also brought a whole different overwhelming feeling: a perplexing combination of relief and freedom. It lifted the weight of expectation. I didn't have to worry about my productivity level because it was out of my hands.
As a result, I'm now contemplating taking a breather from my writing efforts. I suppose I've become too consumed with the elusive goal of achieving publication. My January resolutions all leaned that direction. Mentally, I am constantly agitating over what I should do to achieve that goal. It is draining. Perhaps, I desperately need a writing hiatus. The writing loses the element of fun when expectation overshadows eagerness.
I will admit, this is rather unsettling, a month before my annual November Nanowrimo efforts. Even though I had already considered passing on this year's challenge, it feels too much like surrender. Then again, maybe surrender is exactly what I need at this moment. It is also scary because I think I see my writing as my raison d'etre (reason for existence). Without that as a focus, what do I do with myself? (My husband would say, "Clean, woman! Clean!" - ha!)
I long for feedback from other writers. Is this a normal patch in the road? Am I coming to the end of my writing reserves? Am I giving up by taking time off from my writing goals? How long should my hiatus last? If you are a writer, how do you handle the need for a break? Even God took a Sabbath rest after His creation. Should I wonder at my soul's need for a breather? Who knows, maybe a Sabbath is the key!
No comments:
Post a Comment