One of my favorite aspects of Cardiogirl's blog, is that she blogs with anticipated regularity (Monday through Friday) and she responds to all comments in her comment section (calling it her VIP Lounge), so that it feels like participating in a community discussion. At one point, she even had a telephone option for her VIP lounge and I was able to call in, as well as hear other regular readers. In teen-speak, she is "the bomb." (Unfortunately, that may no longer be teen-speak, since I've been out of that loop for a few years while home with little ones.) I love logging on every weekday and knowing I will hear something from Cardiogirl.
Although I would love to have the following she has and would be thrilled if my comment section felt like a community discussion, I haven't been able to muster it this week. I'm really dragging. I can't stay awake in the evenings. When I have tried to come on and write, my brain has been severely muddled. Plus, I'm feeling somewhat discouraged (not sure exactly what is the cause, but it may have to do with the vague, inconvenient illnesses which we have been battling). Then, I log on and read about other families who are facing serious illnesses and even devastating losses and I feel guilty for my discouragement over unknown issues which merely inconvenience us.
I have so much to be thankful for. One would think that I could find something positive to write about at least every other day. However, this week has been a serious no-go! MS has said some precocious things, I wish I had preserved here. YS is doing well taking his inhaler twice a day. We are awaiting the results of some further tests taken to determine the source of ES's stomach woes. My hubby has been exercising regularly in the evenings in an attempt to stave off the pre-diabetes state which his doctor warned him about. Yet, when I try to write, everything lacks a luster or enthusiasm.
So, for now, I have nothing of great interest to share. I have no enthusiasm with which to share it. I'm hoping this passes soon. For me, not wanting to write is a sad state of affairs (sometimes it seems like that is my life's-blood). I think I'm physically and mentally anemic. Anyone got some iron? I'm slogging off to bed now.
3 comments:
Wendy, for whatever its worth, I have missed hearing what you have to say! I look forward to reading what you write about and a glimpse into the life of you and your boys. It's okay to take a break from blogging. Write when you feel inspired. I have no doubt that you will be re-engerized before long and realize you have plenty of interesting material to share. However, I also sympathize. For the things you have stated, are among the reasons I don't muster the courage to start one of my own. If there is one thing I've discovered through reading your blogs and others is that I am not a writer. I still enjoy oral storytelling with Michael when he asks and I'm not too tired to think one up, but I didn't enjoy the process of writing them down. I hope you enjoy your long weekend with all the boys home together. We have some friends coming over for a cookout tomorrow, but otherwise its a mellow weekend here--a welcome one. ~Karin
Wendy, reading this post makes me realize that we all aspire to be more. I frequently feel the way you are describing.
Am I interesting enough? Am I funny enough? What will I write tomorrow because I'm in a funk today?
It's so funny that I read this today, because just last night (amid kids jumping and screaming and bathing, oh my!) I was writing in my actual paper journal (with my bitchin' new red Sharpie pen -- LOVE IT!) Anyway, I was making (forcing) myself to write down my recent accomplishments.
It was so difficult. I would write down something good but then write further how I should do better. Then I had to write more to say, wait a minute here, I'm supposed to write the positive and stop there.
It was a good exercise because eventually I was able to write about things I'm proud of without discounting myself. And it made me realize how negative I am toward myself.
I still think, if it's helpful to you, you should write out the issues with your sons. They're a part of you and of course you're going to worry and be concerned when one of them has a problem (stomach, inhaler, what have you.)
Now I'm sending you some iron vibes, some happy vibes and some nurturing can-do vibes.
Mix them all together, take them three times a day and call me next week if you don't see improvement.
Good luck and try to just feel your way through it. Something else I'm working on -- trying to feel the emotion and let it go through me rather than trying to minimize or deny it.
Enough, signing off now.
Karin - Thanks so much for faithfully reading my blog. I'm glad you enjoy popping in to hear about us (even when I'm low and things seem an uphill battle). I hope that your writing course is going well. I know I struggled with completing the assignments in a timely manner (thus came the writer's group which I started in IL). Hope you have a relaxing weekend.
CG - Thanks so much for your encouragement. I know that you understand the difficulties of blogging when turmoil surrounds and you just don't feel up to writing. You plug away and that inspires me (of course, not enough to have completed a post for several days this week, but - ah well).
I also want to remind you how much I appreciate your friendship. We've never met, yet you are sending me the iron vibes and "can do" vibes I need. Thanks for your e-mail as well. I'm glad you are enjoying the puzzle book.
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