Book Review: Walking Through Twilight

What a gorgeous, apt cover for this tragic and tender book about a man's experience losing his brilliant wife to a rare form of dementia. I love the blackness of the bottom half - the ground; I love the hazy purple twilight and the stark outline of the living trees against it on the top half. The book opens with a George Herbert poem, "Bitter Sweet," addressed to the Lord:

"Since thou dost love, yet strike;
Cast down, yet help afford;
Sure I will do the like.
I will complain, yet praise;
I will bewail, approve;
And all my sour-sweet days
I will lament and love."

As Job 2:10  says, "We take the good days from God—why not also the bad days?" Indeed, the foreword identifies the author's aim: "to understand something of the hand of God in this valley of suffering and to discern how to live lovingly and faithfully in this shadowy place." I think we all need this lesson. We all encounter our shadowy places and struggle to accept the meaning in the pain.

I appreciated the author's words on lament, giving permission and offering the understanding that there is a time for lament. He writes, "If the perfect Son of God can lament and not sin, so may we." I have been on the receiving end of well-meaning Christian expectations to cast off lament quickly and get back to doing what God would have you do. But, indeed, there is a time to weep.

While this book is definitely a difficult read - such intense sorrow for the loss of an articulate individual's ability to form words and ideas - it offers the author's truth with candor and faith. He is not a sunny Pollyanna, but a realistic climber who only wants to see the slope and make the wisest steps to trek the mountain. How do we live well amid suffering? I think with integrity, honesty, and faith. Somehow, we allow God to hold our hand and surrender the journey to His control.

Book Review: Still Writing

My college roommate, Elizabeth, introduced me to Dani Shapiro's books. I reviewed Inheritance last year. Still Writing jumped out at me then, but I didn't take the time. When I discovered easy access to the e-book online through the library, I dove in. Shapiro has a very no-nonsense manner in her writing encouragement. She tries to tell it straight. Sit in the chair. Put in the hours. Get down the words. Work on the revision. Don't be afraid to put in many hours in the dark before putting your words out there into the light for consumption and criticism. The chapters in the book are brief and easily digested.

I think the hardest thing for me was a chapter called "Smith Corona" because it focused on the futile writing efforts of Dani's mother. Her mother was equally full of wild words, but did not have a clue about how to send them out into the world to her advantage. Dani writes that her mother sent scripts to The Partridge Family producers. "She didn't know that submitting scripts in this manner was about as effective as making them into paper airplanes and flying them out the window." Groan. Can you hear my heart hitting the floor? Immediately, I worried that my writing would follow Dani's mother's trajectory instead of Dani's. If only I had a crystal ball that would declare whether I'll ever achieve any writing success. Wouldn't that be marvelous? Wouldn't that solve the endless battle between putting butt in chair and getting out of the chair because I'm convinced it is all for naught?

I wonder sometimes why I read books on writing. I am desperate for encouragement. Hoping for a flashlight to guide the way in the dark. But, then I discover from other writers, even successful writers, that we're all writing in the dark, a fog where we can only see one step at a time. But, like Dani Shapiro (well, unlike her, because I have no success to speak of) ... I'm still writing.

Book Review: Louisiana's Way Home

Louisiana's Way Home (second stand-alone novel in Kate DiCamillo's recent trio), tells a story of loss, identity, and healing. Again, I didn't feel as pulled in by this tale as earlier DiCamillo books, but it was still a worthwhile investment of time. I imagine there are many children who will benefit from reading this tale (especially adopted individuals or ones who have lost family).

Louisiana Elefante and her granny take off in the middle of the night because Granny says "the day of reckoning has arrived." All Louisiana wants to do is get back to her friends, Raymie and Beverly, in Florida, but Granny is driving (for the moment) and Louisiana is just a kid at the mercy of her elders. When they arrive in Georgia, Granny can drive no more because she is reeling in pain from her rotten teeth. Louisiana takes the wheel and delivers her safely to a dentist who pulls all Granny's teeth. While laid low, Granny pawns Louisiana out to "sing for their supper." It is only after Granny disappears that Louisiana realizes her entire existence has been founded on a lie.

The themes are excellent. I loved Louisiana's quest to discover who she really is and appreciated the minister's message about forgiveness and her power to determine who she wants to be in this world. What truth in the image of a pastor providing the "magic" of "healing words" and what wisdom in accepting love where it is offered! Our hearts lead us to the home where we belong. Love is not determined by birth, but rather by sacrifice and commitment.

Still, I struggled with a few minor things. Unlike the other two books in the trio, my library shelved this one in the children's section. I worried about children following some examples in the tale: children driving illegally, stealing from vending machines, and skipping school, all without consequence. The school issue is at least addressed by the mother, who admonishes her son that he is shutting doors by skipping and we must always try to keep open all our doors and opportunities. Plus, many of the characters were despicable: the motel owner, the organist - even Granny's actions left me disgruntled.

Thankfully, as in a world full of both bad and good people, the story is peppered with kind-hearted, generous individuals as well: the walrus-like minister who listens well, the Grandpap who offers his ice-cream, the cake-baking mother who takes Louisiana under her wing. Louisiana's story holds value and will encourage children in their quest to determine who they wish to be. Children who wrestle with identity issues or struggle with feelings of being cursed will come away from this tale inspired and uplifted. Once again, Kate DiCamillo has provided valuable healing words.

Book Review: The Good Neighbor

Before all the hullabaloo of the pandemic arrived, I attended a library showing of A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood. I thoroughly enjoyed it. How thrilling to discover an audio rendering of Maxwell King's biography of Mr. Rogers, The Good Neighbor: The Life and Work of Fred Rogers. Even though I wouldn't call myself a big fan, I watched Mr. Rogers's Neighborhood in my childhood. Moreover, Jordan Raynor, author of Called to Create, highlighted Fred Rogers's pursuit of excellence in his newsletters. I consider Fred Rogers an excellent person to emulate. One passage in this book, where Rogers revealed his inner critic (something all writers can relate to), especially intrigued me. Just hearing that someone as successful as Fred Rogers struggled with feelings of being a fraud and not living up to what he was called to, filled me with relief. On the outside, we recognize those feelings as unfounded, but the inner critic calls out insistently, regardless.

The back cover proclaims: "Based on original interviews, oral histories, and archival documents, The Good Neighbor takes listeners beyond the gentle man in the sweater, tracing Rogers's personal, professional, and artistic life through decades of work." He was, indeed, the gentle man he appeared to be on television. His foremost commitments were to achieving excellence and nurturing children. He started every day focused on the Lord, and to everything he endeavored, he gave 100 percent. Would that others could say the same of me when I'm gone!

Are Indiana Churches The Proverbial Canary?

Photo by Kaikara Dharma on Unsplash

Desperate to ease the financial pressures of lock-down, the country is beginning disparate re-opening phases. Although the White House issued criteria, many states are ignoring those guidelines. The most significant benchmark calls for a two-week decline in documented cases. In Indiana, from April 27th through May 3rd, they documented an average of 700 additional cases per day on the ISDH website, with no decline in sight. My own rural county has 883 documented cases and 46 deaths. Yet, Indiana is re-opening.

While most businesses will be held to stringent occupancy percentages, Governor Holcomb has given a green light to churches to re-open with no attendance cap. His words, as he described his reasoning, brought to mind the canaries miners often used to alert them to dangerous gases. Holcomb explained, "What we're going to do is learn from these steps that we're taking....  We just thought a good place to start or have a control group, would be places of worship." Control group ... canary ... call it what you will. It appears church-goers will reveal the ramifications of re-opening.

Of course, Governor Holcomb encouraged pastors to follow social distancing guidelines and take adequate cleaning measures. But it raises many questions I fear churches will not take sufficient time to consider and address. Ken Braddy, of Lifeway Christian Resources, attempted to pose many of these questions in his blog article, "Twenty Questions Your Church Should Answer Before People Return." As comments poured in, the twenty questions proved insufficient. He re-titled that blog post and wrote another, "Twenty-Four More Questions the Church Should Ask Before People Return." He mentions many concerns I expected: communion, offering, and especially, enforcing social distancing and cleaning. Will the church turn people away? Will believers eager to see their brothers and sisters in Christ maintain the recommended distance and fight the urge to greet and converse in the hallways? Not to mention the many differing perspectives on the threat. Whose perspective is right?

Is it best to wear a mask and reduce transmission, or is it best to shun masks and increase your body's immune defenses? Will all people eventually encounter this virus or are we actually flattening the curve by sheltering-in-place? Things get even murkier when you address the spiritual dimension. Some assert their faith is proved in their eagerness to resume regular worship (can we truly go back to normal?). Fight fear with faith. Others argue that, while we shouldn't give way to fear (God is the source of our ultimate satisfaction in life or in death), we should also practice the discretion and wisdom He's given to avoid danger. It's like the story of the drowning man who ignores three heavenly-orchestrated opportunities for rescue while praying and asserting his faith in God.

The church we currently attend, in normal circumstances, has barely an open seat for a newcomer. With Governor Holcomb's blessing, they are resuming with a Mother's Day service. Most years, on Mother's Day, it is my greatest desire to worship with my husband and children beside me. This year, I'm conflicted. Indeed, they intend to resume our small group Bible study, held in someone's home. I'm not on board for that either. I don't wish to play the role of canary.

In some ways, this pandemic has encouraged the church to go out into the highways and byways with the gospel. I have invited non-believing friends to watch uplifting and encouraging worship services. David Jeremiah aired an outstanding sermon addressing the corona-virus. On-line viewing eliminates the awkward threat of entering an unfamiliar sanctuary. At other times, I've shared a multitude of virtual worship experiences (I just found this excellent one for "Be Thou My Vision" and one from my friend, Randy Bonifield, "Christ Be All Around Me"). The Salvation Army seldom holds open-air services as they used to, but one Chicago corps took small ensembles out into the communities to share hymns. They reasoned if the people can't go to the church, bring the church to the people. It no doubt blessed those neighbors as they stood at safe distances listening to hymns of the faith.

I'd be the first to declare how much I love singing praise and worship to God among friends and fellow believers. I know how important it is to break the bread of His Word together. Yet, while I understand the intense blessing of corporate worship, I worry we are rushing back into the sanctuary out of eagerness to return to normalcy. And if we let our guard down, telling ourselves the danger is behind us (ignoring the continuing escalation of numbers), will we live to regret it? Or rather, will we die as we regret it? Will our control group experiment prove to Indiana that it is unsafe to return to the mine, singing blithely "Heigh-ho, heigh-ho, it's back to church we go?"

NOTE: While I oppose the idea of "no attendance caps" and using the church as "a control group," I am not wishing to express any criticism of others who feel safe and comfortable returning to their places of worship. My husband will attend our church's socially-distanced service, where I will not. Each individual must do as his conscience and soul directs. I bristle at the expression of worshipers as an expendable commodity to practice on and glean information from as a result of their open attendance together in worship. My heartfelt plea is for caution. Churches must carefully think through each aspect of their worship together. I pray readers will not take offense, but will take every precaution to stay safe.

Am I Too Obsessed With Books?

My husband would say "yes" emphatically. I not only read books, but I wear shirts about books. I keep lists of books I hope to one day read, and I write this book review blog. Last summer, he decided I had gone off the deep end when I saw someone selling more book-patterned furniture. It was such a bargain and ... well, books!

Dragging him and Trevor along, we drove to the seller's house, and the man assisted as my husband and son pushed the pieces into our van and truck. I think John wanted to kill me. The pieces? Well, for $50 I snagged an almost 400 pound armoire/desk and for $25 a matching file cabinet. It was easy to add the file cabinet to my book nook (click here to see what it looked like before). However, the armoire/desk sat in the garage until a week ago, when we lured our friend, Robert (together with his wife) to assist us in attempting to get the thing into the guest room.

Talk about a grueling task! The thing weighs a ton. We could remove none of the solid wood interior drawers or extendable desk surfaces. Plus, it is tall. When we got it on the furniture dolly, it was too tall to fit inside the door frame (not to mention we had to get it up two small steps into what used to be a garage but had been remodeled into our guest room when John's parents added a 3-car garage). After much despairing and plotting, we wedged some boards beneath to alter the angle just enough to slide it in the door and then up the two steps. At least Robert and his wife were both impressed with the piece (and with the sweet furniture dolly John had bought at Lowe's for the task).

Here it is and, boy, does it give me joy! So much joy, in fact, that I agreed to organize my downstairs desk to prepare for moving into this new one (after saying nothing would get me to spend my down-time organizing).

The previous owner added a light inside the cupboard (hence the cord dangling down - will have to do something about that). I should say, John is dubious that I will end up using this amazing piece of furniture. He believes I will tire of pulling the side desk out and then shutting the entire thing up when I'm done working. He worries I will miss the ample space of my downstairs desk (he wants to get rid of that - since I know he might be right, I've told him to hold off for now). Still, I'm thrilled it is finally inside. We had to move my treadmill and will move the chair to the left of it to make room for a rolling office chair.

Here is the matching file cabinet:

Yes! I probably am too obsessed with books!

Book Review: The Case for Miracles

When my oldest son moved to Houston, I wanted to send him a welcome-to-your-new-home card and enclose a restaurant gift card. While scanning a map of his new neighborhood, I also looked at nearby churches. I discovered an interesting place called The Story Church, ministering to unchurched populations. How cool, to learn from their website, that shortly after Bryce's arrival in Houston, they would host an interview with atheist-turned-Christian journalist Lee Strobel. Although Bryce didn't go, I watched the entire (1-1/2 hour) interview. The first half focused on his journey from skepticism to belief. The second half delved into his research for his most recent Case book, The Case for Miracles: A Journalist Investigates Evidence for the Supernatural.

At one point in the interview, the pastor asks Strobel to share one of the most compelling miracle stories he encountered. If you click on the link to the interview and go to the 48 minute mark, you can watch/listen to an eight-minute segment airing evidence for a stunning miracle in the life of a Houston pastor (well-worth the time investment - indeed, I appreciated the whole interview). I listed the mentioned books I intended to seek: Strobel's own The Case for Miracles, Douglas Groothuis' Walking Through Twilight (a book about a philosopher's experience with his demented wife - a book I simultaneously dread and anticipate), and Tricia Lott Williford's And Life Comes Back. How thrilling, in this pandemic season, to find all three titles available in e-book form through a local library!

I didn't need Strobel's book to convince me that God still intervenes in our world through the use of miracles. When I was three, I had a near-death experience of double pneumonia. The very moment my father changed his prayer from a prayer for healing to a prayer relinquishing me into God's hands, I sat up and asked the doctors what they were doing. On another occasion, as a teenager missing the horn I left behind after they moved my parents to South Dakota, I marveled when my father followed God's direction to purchase a horn for the corps, despite a lack of funds. A week later, a letter arrived with close to the exact amount from a donor who wanted the money used for an instrument for the Salvation Army band in our corps. I fully believe God intervenes in our natural world. Oh, for faith to trust Him even more!

Lee Strobel takes the same method as in his other Case series books. He interviews various scholars and lays groundwork for the reader to decide what conclusion the evidence supports. Indeed, the results of the Barna survey that Strobel commissioned emphasize that more Americans believe than disbelieve in miracles. In fact, two in five claim to have experienced one personally, a mind-boggling number!

Yet, while Americans say they believe in the miraculous, do they really? A conversation Strobel had with a theology professor who observed the response of African and Asian students to American Christianity especially struck me. These students timidly admit they are perplexed by the lack of power in evangelical Christianity. They come from countries where spiritual warfare is a common experience, and it is hard to accept how educated Christians in American discount the miraculous and doubt the supernatural.

Whether you pick this book up to read of astonishing stories of miracles (like the opening one taken from the life of Dr. Ben Carson or the one shared in the interview link), or to digest the arguments outlined for and against, Strobel presents the evidence and leaves the verdict to the reader. Perhaps you're like me and have personal experience with supernatural events. Or maybe you wrestle with unanswered prayers - a hard topic for many. I agree with Strobel's conclusion because conversion itself is as miraculous as it gets. God is in the business of taking skeptics and turning them into believers. He steps into this fallen world and redeems what is broken. That is miracle enough for me!