Compilation: A Dozen Books on Depression/Anxiety

In thinking of Mental Health Awareness Month, I decided to provide a compilation of books on depression and anxiety. As stated before, I know this list will not be conclusive in any way. These are merely books I have read and reviewed (in chronological order). Perhaps you might find them helpful:

1. Poe's Heart and the Mountain Climber by Richard Restak, M.D. - non-fiction
2. Who Switched Off My Brain by Dr. Caroline Leaf - non-fiction
3. The Chemistry of Joy by Dr. Henry Emmons - non-fiction
4. The Omega-3 Connection by Dr. Andrew Stoll - non-fiction
5. Beyond Blue by Therese J. Borchard - non-fiction
6. My Age of Anxiety by Scott Stossel - memoir
7. When We Collided by Emery Lord - YA novel
8. My Anxious Mind by Katherine A. Martinez and Michael A. Tompkins
9. The Power of Different by Gail Saltz, M.D. - non-fiction
10. Life Inside My Mind by 31 YA authors
11. Maybe You Should Talk to Someone by Lori Gottlieb - non-fiction
12. Acedia and Me by Kathleen Norris - memoir

I think my favorite was the very first one, Poe's Heart and the Mountain Climber. I remember Bryce's comment after hearing me listen to it in the car on our drives back and forth to school. He remarked, "Anxiety, blah, blah, blah, anxiety, blah, blah, blah." I also highly recommended Lori Gottlieb's book, Maybe You Should Talk to Someone. Some of these reads sprung from my battle with panic attacks and newfound anxiety. Others arose out of research for a young adult novel I wrote about a protagonist with paralyzing anxiety.

As several of these books attest, the presence of depression and anxiety does not automatically preclude usefulness. Indeed, in The Power of Different, Gail Saltz talks about how creative and productive individuals often battle anxiety and depression, and how it tends to drive their creativity. Kathleen Norris also identifies the spiritual benefits of traversing an emotional wasteland. Think of the many spiritual giants who have also struggled against melancholy temperaments: David and Elijah, Charles Spurgeon and Mother Theresa. Next up I would like to explore Companions in the Darkness: Seven Saints Who Struggled With Depression and Doubt by Diana Gruver. You can find an interesting interview with Gruver here. If you struggle with depression and anxiety, perhaps you, too, will go on to impact the world in a positive way despite your despair. 

2023 Spring News

Time just keeps marching on and we are swept into stages we can't even fathom. I'm now 2 years away from 60 and my husband turns 60 in June. How is that possible? Of course, we had our kids later in life, so I think we've been able to fool ourselves into thinking we're still young (even when our bodies are shouting that we're not). But, we're fast approaching an empty nest and now, our oldest is engaged.

Bryce and Elizabeth picked out the ring ahead of time, so I don't really think it was a surprise. 

At the last minute, I received a call saying, "Mom, pray... it is supposed to rain right when I've planned the proposal and the photographer to capture it. I've checked and there are no alternative indoor options." So, we prayed. He was grateful the skies didn't open and pour. It may have been a bit overcast, but everything went off without a hitch. 

Here's another photo and one from an April visit to Indy for a friend's wedding (love Elizabeth's dress - the color just pops):

Trevor decided to attend his final prom, even though he graduated early in December (walks soon with his class to receive his diploma). Last year, they didn't do photos at our place and I don't think I even captured the moment. I'm blown away by the difference between his 2021 prom photo and his 2023 photo. He has slimmed down tremendously. He is exceedingly careful about what he eats now and when he works out, his sessions generally last over 2 hours. Crazy that! This year's photos:

2021 prom photos:

Book Review: Before Amen

It would have been better if I had listened to Max Lucado's Before Amen, before J. I. Packer's Praying. Lucado offers superb storytelling and simple explication of prayer, but not the depth and intellect Packer brings to his book. Of course, Lucado didn't set out to write an intense treatise on prayer. His subtitle declares: The Power of a Simple Prayer.

Lucado's proposed pocket prayer is easy to remember and recite: "Father, you are good. I need help. They need help. Thank you, In Jesus' name. Amen" As he breaks down each portion of this prayer, Lucado identifies God as trustworthy and praiseworthy (similar to Packer) and our prayers as essential and effective. In this prayer, we identify who God is, how deeply sinful and needy we are, how important it is to intervene on behalf of others, and our enduring gratitude for God's intervention in our lives. Lucado highlights these as four prayer strengths: worship, trust, compassion, and gratitude. So, if you want a simple book on prayer, this one breaks it down into easy-to-follow steps. 

Mid-month Mention #2: Anxiety Book & Podcast

May is Mental Health Awareness Month. Having struggled for years with chronic depression, this is a topic near to my heart. Since I have had 3 major depressive episodes, I have a 99 percent chance of relapse should I ever decide to go off medication. While I loath my dependence on medication, I am truly grateful that it helps even me out. What's more, it enables me to be myself. Without the meds, I become a person I don't recognize.

I'm sure I'm not alone in my struggles. Given the way the world is spinning, more join the ranks daily. Many complexities assault our young people: information overload, insidious comparisons, and harmful opportunities. As a result, fear grips them in its vise. Several individuals on my Facebook prayer list have requested prayer for anxiety management. Immobilizing anxiety is a beast within and often difficult to fight.

I recently learned of the Fearless Unite website and a book by Christy Boulware, called Nervous Breakthrough. I joined the Fearless Unite newsletter. When a recent link to a podcast came up, I intended to only listen for a few minutes. Forty minutes later, I was so glad I stuck around and I immediately forwarded the information to individuals I know who face this battle. The podcast highlights an interview with a 19-year-old, Faith McDonald. She struggles with paralyzing (emotionally chained to the bathroom floor) anxiety. I loved how it suggested important ways to support an anxiety-laden friend or family member. If you, or a loved one, need encouragement and hope amid panic attacks and life-altering anxiety, I highly recommend listening to this podcast.

Click here to sign up for weekly anxiety tips and a free bonus chapter of Christy Boulware's book.

Mid-month Mention: Writers and a Writers Conference

I'm not a big subscriber to newsletters. I only subscribe if my interest in the author's newsletter is strong. Plus, I would say a deal-breaker for me is an author who provides recommended reading titles. Jordan Raynor gives one noteworthy recommendation to close his weekly newsletter. I may skim through the devotional, but I always take time to consider the book suggestion. Jordan highlights non-fiction suggestions. You can visit his website and sign up for his newsletter if you want a weekly faith and work devotional along with a Christian non-fiction book recommendation.

In February, I entered a giveaway and encountered D'ann Mateer. She lives in Texas, just a stone's throw away from my son, Bryce. Her blog posts must have reeled me in because I signed on for her newsletter. She offers extensive reading recommendations and regular giveaways. In fact, it looks like now, if you sign up for her newsletter, you receive a free short story from her. That was not the case when I signed on. In addition, I trust her to recommend clean reads. Since she often highlights World War II novels, I forwarded her information to my sister, but I don't think she was up for more mail in her overflowing in-box. A few days ago, D'ann sent a book recommendation for an enticing book on Lewis and Tolkien. This month's newsletter highlighted a blog post about things she has learned about writing.

Learning more about writing is always on my mind. I've taken on-line courses and read books. But, when I lived in DeKalb, IL, my writing group often tried to take an annual trip to attend the Write-to-Publish Conference in Wheaton, IL. This was, perhaps, my favorite educational excursion. Oh, the laughs we had on the shared drive over and back. I attended two or three times while we lived in IL and have been once since we moved to IN. The only other similar conference I attended, was a one day meeting of the Society for Children's Book Writers and Illustrators in a quaint town in Wisconsin (where I tried to pitch my rhyming children's book, Recipe for Stew).

The Write-to-Publish Conference is under new leadership, now owned and managed by the Christian Writers Institute. It takes place at Wheaton College from June 13-16, 2023. If you wish to get in on the reduced rates, you must register by May 31st. Of course, the best approach is to pay for full registration, which includes all sessions and meals, plus 2 one-on-one meetings with key editors/agents, and a Friday night concert by Michael Card. 

I can't afford to invest in the full experience this year. Last time I attended for one day, so I considered doing so again. The full fee is $600, while the daily fee is a little over $200. Instead of 2 meet-ups with editors/agents, you only secure one. Plus, in viewing the schedule, the sessions I am most interested in fall on the final day - Friday. This poses a problem. In the past (although I don't know if this is still the method), you signed up for the slots at the outset of the conference. This would mean, by arriving Friday, all the slots will be gone and I will not make my hoped-for connections.

The most important benefit to attending a conference is making connections. You can connect with publishers and befriend other writers who may become cheerleaders for your writing goals. The last time I attended for one day, I did not pay for the meals (then, a separate fee) and thus didn't have those prime opportunities to sit with and talk to other writers or faculty members. A conference is an opportunity to network, learn, and grow as a writer. But there are key things to do to improve these results.

The first thing I always do is review which manuscripts I wish to pitch to editors or agents. Next, I study the faculty line-up. I get to know them and their manuscript interests. Then I write a list of individuals who might show an interest in what I'm pitching. The truly hard part is snagging time to make an elevator pitch (a one to two-minute hook to grab interest). If you cannot secure a one-on-one session, you must seek other opportunities in a natural and unobtrusive way. This is where meals were helpful, yet four or five other writers may be there wanting to pull the ear of the faculty member as well.

Once my game plan is in place, I skim the sessions on offer. I try to select topics that will improve my chances of meeting my writing goals. For Friday's first workshop, I'm torn between "The Formation and Execution of a Publishable Idea," and "Writing with God: Creating Spirit-led Content That Resonates, Maintaining Healthy Expectations, and Building an Unshakable Faith for Your Journey." For the second workshop, I'm torn between "The Most Common Mistakes Authors Make When Developing and Pitching Their Book Project," and "Writing to a Felt Need That Publishers Will Want to Publish and Readers Will Want to Read." This year, the plenary speaker is Dr. Leland Ryken, father of the current Wheaton College president and my former professor (I love his wry style). The evening speaker is Jerry B. Jenkins.

I'm noticing many changes to the structure and execution of the conference. Instead of meeting in the Billy Graham Center, they will hold sessions in the Beamer Center. This will be different. In the past, they offered a manuscript critique included with the conference fee. One year, the initial pages of one of my young adult novels netted a request for submission. That was exciting. Now, instead of providing a critique, the conference fee includes a copy of this year's Christian Writers Market Guide. They also used to offer a time for fellow-writer critiques. These sessions occurred after the evening program and provided a chance to read a bit of your work aloud and receive feedback. It seems to me there are hundreds of attendees and limited numbers of faculty meet-ups (were those one-on-one sessions previously ten minutes long, to accommodate more people?). Surely, they'd all be gone by the time I arrived on the final full day, so maybe my plan isn't productive. Still, if this is just the thing you need to jumpstart your writing career, check it out! 

Book Review: Praying

I seldom listen to audio books twice, but had to for J. I. Packer's Praying: Finding Our Way Through Duty to Delight. It was so good; I wanted to take notes. The first time around, I did most of my listening during a lengthy car trip. The second time around, I sat next to the CD player with my hand poised to take notes on my phone. During prayer, so often our minds lose focus or set prayers feel hollow, but good praying is both a duty and a delight. One of my favorite quotes was, "Never think that time is wasted which is given to God." So true!

Packer says this is "not a how to, but a who to or to whom" of prayer. He identifies God's attributes and proves that God is trustworthy and praiseworthy. Thus, authentic prayer, Packer says, follows scripture, flows from responsive, grateful obedience, and from purity of heart. In the next section, the author turns to Bunyan's Pilgrim's Progress (this is why I wanted to re-listen). He outlines the stages of Pilgrim's journey: cross, conflict, companionship, cruelty of the world to Christians, compromise, carelessness, crossing the Jordan.

I love that he recites a piece about friendship I have heard before (I do not know whom to attribute it to): "A friend is a push when you have stopped, a word when you are lonely, a guide when you are searching, a smile when you are sad, a song when you are glad. A friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out." Thus, he who has a friend is blessed beyond measure.

Finally, I loved the section discussing misunderstandings about prayer. Some view prayer as a superstitious illusion or a stated wish or notion. They reason that because God already knows your need and has a will, it is pointless to pray. Not so! In every child-parent relationship, the child approaches the parent to express their perceived need. When the Father meets that need, the child grows confident in the Father's love. 

Packer addresses another misunderstanding I have encountered. One Christian urged another to declare healing to God. She insisted that declaring healing would bring the desired healing. She also shared about a friend whose house was on fire and when the friend asserted "Not today!" the fire spontaneously stopped. I believe this is an error in understanding. As Packer observes, "they think because they pray earnestly that whatever they ask will happen and the only obstacle would be if they weren't praying earnestly enough." But we do not twist God's arm. We should not say, "MY will be done." When Jesus said "ask what you will," He added the control, "according to His will." As Packer emphasizes, "God, not the person praying, is in charge," and we "should focus not on ourselves, but on God." We can trust Him because He answers in the best way and at the best time. Often, we do not know what or when is best. We pray to submit those needs to His will.

Book Review: Not My Daughter

Although I've seen books by Barbara Delinsky, my gut feeling said I'd never read one. Then, I re-checked my blog and discovered a review for her book, Escape, in 2012. As it wasn't an outstanding pull, I'm not surprised to have gone 11 years without dipping a toe in a Delinsky book again. Plus, I think the lure of this book was two-fold. One, it was an available audio book when my treadmill time required one. And two, Cassandra Campbell, whose voice I've enjoyed before, narrated it. So, I took a gamble on Not My Daughter.

This novel explores what it takes to be a good mother. I regret relating so strongly to this book. Alas, I fall in the camp of parents with children who follow unapproved paths. They banished Susan Tate when she became pregnant at 17. But now she's 35 and the principal of the local high school. She has done well for herself and her daughter Lily, fighting for independence and achievement every step of the way. You would think that she, of all people, would know how to respond when Lily drops the bombshell that she is pregnant. Certainly better than her own parents responded to her pregnancy. But Lily's pregnancy isn't the only plate spinning. Alas, talk swirls about a pact and more mothers are on the community chopping block for not keeping their daughters under lock and key. Susan, as principal, bears the brunt of the town's displeasure.

Judgment. Condemnation. Questions of parental ability. It all hit very close to home. Indeed, I've walked a mile in those shoes. Lessons in perspective. Examples of good and bad reactions. Strained relationships healed by weathering the tragedy. I have walked there, as well. This tale swept me in and I felt the stings and blows. I kept expecting a more sinister explanation behind the pact, but that never materialized. Perhaps my imagination ran away with me. Regardless, it was full of tension and intrigue. I still won't seek another book by this author, but this story was well told and emotionally stirring.

Content Caution: 📒 - sex

2023 FB Prayer Project Progress

Today, May 4th, 2023, is the observed National Day of Prayer. What better time to provide an update on my ongoing 2023 Facebook Prayer Project inspired by Amy Weinland Daughters' book, Dear Dana. (Gold medal winner in the Nautilus Book Awards for memoir) I'm so grateful for stumbling upon Amy's book and for the structure her project lends to mine. I'm now 1/3 through the year and my goal of praying for my Facebook friends. By the end of this week, I will have prayed for 144 individuals.

I have petitioned God's throne for surgeries (breast cancer removal, ACL, and hip replacement), childbirth, and court cases. I have prayed for healing from childhood abuse, PTSD, anxiety, and depression. It has been my privilege to intervene for job concerns and pet losses, for prodigals and missionaries, for course completion and foster parenting. Many praises are trickling in: a child's new job in London, a safe delivery of a first grandchild, and peace in the midst of a horrible-no-good-week.

Settling into a structure has certainly helped to attain my goal of reading less and praying more. Every Wednesday, I draw 8 slips from my bag of Facebook friends' names and alert them to my upcoming week of prayer for them. Next, I take what I know (some respond, but for many, I must scour their wall to find information to lead me) and select a scripture verse to pray for each individual for the rest of that week. Every Saturday, I send a message (a month out) reminding them that they were prayed for and alerting them to the verse I selected to accompany my prayers. This is also when I offer to place needs on an ongoing prayer list and request any information they can give about answered prayer.

I have a set routine. I pray for each individual using a 3x5 card with information including family names of spouses, children, and grandchildren, in addition to any specific prayer requests shared. For some (if hard to glean information) it is hard to fill the time, but I shoot for 3 to 5 minutes per person, 3 times each day (before my morning devotions, some time after noon, and prior to bedtime). Since many do not give any specifics, I have developed two lists of guided prayer topics. When I was using one list of ten topics, my prayers felt too rote and repetitive. Although I originally intended to fast while praying, once a week, I only managed to maintain that for a brief time. Sob!

It is surprising how often my prayers for others' needs reminds me of my own need for the same request. I am equally astonished by the depth some are willing to share and the silence of some I thought would reply. How comforting to know that even when I don't know the details I should provide in my prayers, God is aware of the needs of each individual. And for everyone, I pray that God would bring them into relationship with Him and deepen whatever trust and belief they may already hold. It has been a privilege. The time I've spent has been far more valuable than the time I would've devoted to reading. May you lift prayers to the Father today and may He answer in His perfect wisdom and impeccable timing. Praise God, He is never too soon and never too late.

Book Review: Praying for My Life

One of my Facebook friends, whose name I drew early in my 2023 Prayer Project, is battling breast cancer. Following her mass removal and reconstruction surgery, she faced a further battle with depression. In seeking to encourage her, I headed downstairs to find a book I could send. I settled on an older devotional I had on hand: Rhythms of the Heart: Readings That Connect Your Mood to God's Word by Shelley Chapin with Joni Eareckson Tada. While scanning my shelves, I also happened upon this book (knowing my mother-in-law's great love of Guideposts, I think this was probably a book she passed along to me at some point).

Praying for My Life: Holding On to God's Promises, No Matter What was written by Marion Bond West (and published by Guideposts). Marion's husband, Jerry, died of cancer, leaving her to raise their four children. The book walks the reader through countless situations demanding relentless faith in God. Marion is an outstanding storyteller. Each chapter held my attention fast and made me reassess the trials I sometimes find overwhelming. The challenging stories of her twin sons left me exhausted. What whirling dervishes! Their antics made my sons look like angels (if you read my blog from the outset, when mine were small, you would know they tested me sorely).

While the twins were a handful in their early years, they were a hurricane of trouble as they hit their teens. Marion struggled to parent effectively. Her grief often stood in the way. Her desire to be used by God also led her to seek opportunities to speak into the lives of others before speaking into the lives of her own sons. By young adult age, they presented tremendous trials. One battled drug addiction and the other manic depression. Yet Marion continued to cling to God's promise of restoration. I appreciated her honesty and vulnerability. She doesn't gloss over her weaknesses or inadequate responses.  

This book aided my current prayer ministry. It reminded me we must pour out our intercession for others because God holds those prayers in golden bowls in heaven (Revelation 5:8 and 8:3-5). But, even more, it spurred on my prayer for my prodigal son. If I read this book for no other reason, the impact of a question on page 74 was worth every page turned. Marion's daughter posed a question that stopped me in my tracks. She asked, "Mother, how do we know that our continual fear and worry isn't a worse sin than being addicted to drugs or whatever?" Ouch!

Are you facing overwhelming odds in some situation of life? Praying for My Life will lift your eyes to One who holds every circumstance in His hands. It will remind you to intercede with urgency. To believe He will repay the years the locusts eat. It will encourage you to pray as if your life depended on it. You will claim these verses in Habakkuk:

"Though the fig tree should not blossom, nor fruit be on the vines, the produce of the olive fail and the fields yield no food, the flock be cut off from the fold and there be no herd in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the LORD; I will take joy in the God of my salvation. GOD, the Lord, is my strength; he makes my feet like the deer's; he makes me tread on my high places." - Habakkuk 3:17-19 (ESV)