Book Review: Something of Value

Prior to starting my blog, I noticed an advertisement for a memoir writing class. It met for six Tuesdays at a nearby library. My husband and I agreed that it would be great for me to try to attend this class, not necessarily because I've always wanted to write a memoir of my life, but more because I desperately needed something to focus on apart from my all-encompassing job of caring for my family. Unfortunately, it didn't work out. One Tuesday, my husband was called in to work, which meant I couldn't attend the afternoon class. Another Tuesday, I was ill and another Tuesday the little boys were ill. I believe I only attended two of the classes (thankfully the price had been right - free - so I didn't lose any money based on my lack of attendance).

At one of the class sessions, I met a woman named Carlene Crum, who had already written her memoir and was in the process of getting it self-published. This was inspiring and, although we didn't really talk much, I felt encouraged by meeting her. Imagine my surprise, when I noticed her book in the recent releases section of the library.

Carlene's book is entitled Something of Value: A Mother's Spiritual Journey with a Special-Needs Child. The title reaffirmed my own beliefs that every child is of great value despite their ability or inability to give anything tangible back to society. I was eager to read the story of the Crum's brain-damaged son, Ben, whom they cared for over a 17 year period.

My favorite part of the book was when Carlene discussed her new understanding of the kind of love God has for each of us. She explained that she couldn't fathom the depth of love she felt for her child. She wrote:

"I noticed that I was filled with love for Ben who had nothing to give to the world, so to speak. It was immediately obvious that he was totally unable to administer any self-care ... not to mention accomplishing something for others. Yet, I never tired of loving him. Then the light bulb in my mind turned on. This is God's kind of love!"

Carlene and her husband recognized that God had a purpose and a plan for them in their son's life. They continued to cling to belief in His love and provision. They grew spiritually as a result of the journey which life with their son provided. Moreover, in the last sentence of her book, Carlene, identifies the "Something of Value" not as her son, but as God. She wrote, "God was, is and always will be the Something of Value that we gained while our son Benjamin was with us."

My great disappointment with this book was that I wanted to be pulled into the story first and then the lessons. Sadly, the story itself is presented in only a limited light. The driving focus, rightly or wrongly, is on the Scriptural truths which became apparent in their lives as they cared for their child. I am sure that others will glean encouragement from this book. A reader who has struggled with the difficulties of caring for a special needs child will certainly feel a kinship with the author and the story of her growth.

I guess it makes me think about witnessing strategies. Some people are constantly in the process of preaching sermons to those around them, in the sincere desire to draw the other person into a closer relationship with God. Others live their lives, befriend others, tell their story and allow others to draw their own conclusions. I am drawn to the story of others.

I'm not averse to hearing Scriptural support for God's hand in our lives. Yet, I wanted to say to the author, "Show me your story, don't tell me the verses that you learned." I am glad this woman took the time to set down what she felt the Lord wanted her to share. I am glad that she included photos of her son at the end of the book (I felt more connected through the photos than the words). I can't imagine what it must have been like to walk in her shoes with the constant demands of caring for her son (and I complain about getting only a few snatched hours away from my perfectly healthy little guys - for shame!). I just wish I could have tried her shoes on by reading her book.