Book Review: The Forever Letter

Perhaps I have too much going on in my life or too much to think about these days, but for whatever reason, I cannot seem to focus on reading lately. Of course, this would be no problem at all if I didn't write a book review blog. But, alas, I feel a pressure to keep consistent in my posting and that makes me even less eager to spend time reading, for some reason. The reading slump that took hold shortly after spring break continues to plague me. This book, The Forever Letter, is the only physical book I've completed since spring break. I think I felt personally driven to read this particular book because my oldest son will be graduating from Purdue University this Sunday, with a degree in chemical engineering, and will move to Ohio and begin his first official job in June. I have been toying with the idea of writing a letter to him at this important juncture and so this book appeared on my horizon at just the right time.

Rabbi Elana Zaiman provides the reader with an in-depth look at what is essentially the Jewish practice of writing ethical wills. The "forever letter," or ethical will, is a letter you write to your offspring sharing your values, passions, and desires for them. Some parents write these letters when they know they will be facing death shortly, after a cancer diagnosis perhaps, but others choose to pour forth their thoughts to their children even when there is no urgency or when their children are too young to fully appreciate the gesture.

I think I was most grateful for the lists of questions and subjects to contemplate prior to composing your forever letter. The book is a sounding board for honing in on what you truly desire to share with your children. I used quite a few of these writing prompts in my daily journaling, but have yet to compose my forever letter to my oldest son. Then comes the question, will I write letters to the two younger boys? What if something unexpected were to happen and only Bryce had received a personal letter from me? Would I feel like I had shortchanged the two younger boys? So, perhaps I will be focusing on writing three letters, instead of just one.

If you are at all interested in jotting down a letter to present to your children, you couldn't go wrong skimming through this brainstorming book. It will help you clarify your values and thoughts. It will give you a jumping off place for beginning the difficult process of passing along the things you think are most important to express. Even if you never take the plunge and write a letter, just thinking about this process is beneficial. I've already come to see several areas in my own life where I am failing to live out my values. If this book motivates me to pursue those values more purposefully, then it will have profited me far more than I expected when I picked it up. I cherish every personal letter I have received from others over the years, and I hope that I will complete a forever letter for my children that they can cherish, as well. Writing letters might seem like a thing of the past, but this book encourages readers to pursue the practice to leave a legacy of words for future generations.