2026 Baby Bucket List - February Progress

Photo by Glenn Carstens-Peters on Unsplash

I enjoy setting and assessing goals, even when a lack of progress brings discouragement. My husband and I don't have a great track record when it comes to commemorating monumental moments in our marriage (that's a mouthful). For our 25th anniversary, I simply posted our surprise at reaching it and our commitment to fighting for the marriage. I bemoaned our Covid-foiled 30th anniversary celebrations, settling for a list of 30 small things we could do to celebrate. It was, indeed, discouraging that we only completed a handful from the list. While I would have loved to travel to Barcelona, to view the La Sagrada Familia, our 35th wedding anniversary passed unnoticed, as well.

Thus, I don't hold out a lot of hope for this new endeavor, but I'm documenting it (to spur us on to some sort of completion maybe) and tracking our progress, or lack thereof. This year, I made an EASY list. Tempted by advertisements for deals on my Facebook feed, I wrote down ones I'd like to try. These are not typical bucket list locations. Indeed, you won't find any five-star restaurants or places that come to $30-50 per meal. Most of the appeal for me is in the savings angle. Of course, my husband is not a savings nut, so he often negates my savings by selecting whatever strikes his fancy.

For this 2026 Baby Bucket List, I ticked off 23 restaurants, 3 festivals, 4 places, and 7 movies. The restaurants began with a list of specials I had noticed, things like the Beef-a-Roo $5.55 meal, the Red Robin $9.99 Big Yumm Burger deal, the Logan's Roadhouse $11.99 Real Deal meal, and the BJ's Brewhouse $13 Pizookie deal. 

(image from Beef-a-Roo website)

(image from Logan's Roadhouse website)

I also added locations I'd like to try or introduce to my husband, like Ms B's Teas, Brie & Bartlett, and Jagger's. I tried to tally 26 restaurants (an every other week goal), but the last three ended up being events: Amo Fish Fry, Fair-on-the-Square, and the Quaker Days Festival.

For the first place, I selected a new-to-me bed-and-breakfast in Danville, Indiana, called The Marmalade Sky. Next, I'm hoping to book a get-away to the retreat center in Northern Indiana where I used to take November writing retreats, back when I was participating in National Novel Writing Month (Nanowrimo). Third, I'd like to take the Rockin' Thunder river lunch excursion in Madison, Indiana. For the fourth place, I'm hoping we'll head toward Southern Indiana and visit French Lick, Jasper, or Loogootee.

I'm least hopeful for the movies. My husband is neither a traveler nor a movie-goer. He scorns most modern movies because they're full of filth and bad language. But, there are several I hope to see, some way or another. The first I wanted to see was H is for Hawk. We missed it, due to bad weather and dangerous roads. I'm glad I didn't drag him out to see Wuthering Heights, over Valentine's weekend, because I read the movie opens with an explicit execution scene. Why? Why must they trash the classics? I may get my youngest to go see Project Hail Mary with me in March, as he watched Andy Weir's other novel adaptation, The Martian. Then, I'd like to see A Great Awakening (April), and The Sheep Detectives (May). Finally, I hope to watch the adaptation of one of my 2024 favorite reads, Remarkably Bright Creatures, if Sean still has Netflix then (out 5/8/26 and starring Sally Field). Then, perhaps The Magician's Nephew, in November. Don't be surprised if 2026 flies and none of those movies met my eyes (unintentional rhyme).

So, here we are nearing the end of February. We have managed to check off three items. Our first attempted visit to Beef-a-Roo was dashed because some sort of maintenance issue closed the dining area (and I didn't relish eating a gooey Beef-n-Cheddar in the car). Thankfully, we tried again on another visit to our son, and this time the dining area was available. I purchased the $5.55 deal and my husband's meal was possibly 3 times that, ha!

For Valentine's weekend, we booked a room at Marmalade Sky. John has been having further sleep issues (this is becoming a constant and wearing problem), so we requested the Tabatha Room for its king bed. We had lunch at Danville's delightful Bread Basket restaurant and bakery. We've both been there before, but I love their BLTEA sandwich (which adds egg and avocado to the typical BLT). John took the opportunity to buy a small cherry pie and a loaf of honey oat bread. Check out all these bakery items. The food was fantastic!

I will try to re-cap again in May. Hopefully, we will have ticked off more items by then (when the weather is more conducive). I know completing all 37 items is impossible. Still, it's fun to set a goal. 

Have you ever written a one-year bucket list? Do you have a life-long bucket list? Are your items all big-ticket items (like some of the 250 ideas listed in this Cassie Scroggins blog post)? Have you read Brad Fischer's The Sand Bucket List?

Book Review: If You Want to Write

Brenda Ueland's If You Want to Write is an encouraging pep talk, and one I needed. I loved many things about this book. Primarily, I loved her explanation that criticism kills creativity. When a writer presents a work to another for feedback, that individual can spur the writer on or defeat their soul. Heavy-handed criticism, voiced to "help improve the writing," shrinks the heart of the writer, causing them to second-guess their abilities instead of freeing those abilities to flow. 

Ueland, as a writing instructor, points out the noteworthy sentences and fragments and draws the writer out into the open instead of shutting them down. It reminded me of wise words I heard when I worked with an outstanding 3rd grade teacher, Ms. McKee. She explained that when faced with a student beset by negative behaviors, the best course of action is to highlight and praise positive ones. Catch them doing something good. Encouragement often works better than correction.

I also loved the idea that art is infection. When something is well written, the reader catches the writer's vision. He or she sees what the writer sees, feels what the writer feels. If you are writing on a subject you feel passionate about, that passion will pour from the pen. It will ignite passion in someone else.

At the end of this book, Ueland reiterates a dozen principles for creating art that further inspire the writer to think positively about their goals. She asserts everyone has talent, is original, and has something important to say. She reminds us that writing is a privilege rather than something too hard to approach. Her encouragement? "Write freely, recklessly, and in first drafts." This supports what I learned in almost ten years of participating in Nanowrimo (National Novel-Writing Month): writing flows when you silence the inner critic and push to create a rough draft. Spit it out! You can spit-shine later! 

Fear is often what holds a writer back. Will it be good enough? Ueland urges the writer not to fear writing terrible stories. She recommends writing two more and then returning to the first story. Good writing taps the true, honest, and untheoretical self. I loved her phrase, "Think of yourself as an incandescent power, illuminated by God." 

Moreover, she warns against the comparison trap. "You are like no other being ever created." Thus, I must remember that nobody else bears or can weave the story God has given me to weave. Makes me want to fire up my laptop and write!

A Tithe of My Talents

Photo by Gregor Moser on Unsplash

Today is November 1st. Every year, since 2009, I have started a new novel/work at the outset of November with the Nanowrimo (National Novel Writing Month) challenge (a challenge to write 50,000 words of a novel within the space of November's 30 days). Throughout the past three weeks of my writing sabbatical, an internal argument raged over this year's participation. I'm fatigued and broken, not in a position to begin a new novel. The novels I've written languish in files, unworthy of agent/editor attention. Thanks to my Write-to-Publish critiques, my writing mojo has vanished, replaced by insecurity over my ability to pull off a well-written novel. The problems seem myriad: inconsistent point-of-view usage (head-hopping), insufficient world-building, passive voice construction, weak characters the reader cannot get behind, too much back story (information dumps), too much telling instead of showing, and secondary characters overshadowing the heroine. That's a lot to swallow, a tremendous amount to overcome. I feel paralyzed just trying to approach these weaknesses in my writing.

Yet, deep within, I cannot believe my writing efforts are hopeless. I know that God has given me some talent (even if insufficient at this point). I'm also convinced He intends me to use the talent He has given. So, in thinking about this significant day, I made an alternate decision. I will use this month to tithe on my talent, giving every word written in November back to Him. I will focus my efforts on words devoted to His glory.

Christians often emphasize the imperative to tithe on the monies that God puts at our disposal. I have no personal money. I make no income (perhaps that is why I fight those feelings of uselessness). But I desire to write and give my words back to Him. With the little drummer boy, I offer my humble rat-a-tat-tat. Like the young boy in the crowd listening to Jesus, I give up my meager loaves and fishes for His use.

Even though my novels build on a Christian framework, I have no fresh ideas for stories to glorify God. Perhaps, as my husband has suggested, I am supposed to focus on non-fiction words dedicated for His interest. Even as I enter this set-apart month, I don't know fully what that looks like, but I'm determined to live out my "nothing wasted" mantra and committed to tithing this month's words to His purposes.

If you are a Christian writer, how do you tithe on your talents? What does that look like for you? How do you give a tenth of your talents and efforts to God's glory? I guess if Christian practice suggests a tenth, one month doesn't even suffice. If I'm eager to devote a tenth, I should give the whole month of November and one week of December. Everything I have comes from God. I'm ready to give Him the "first fruits" of my labors. I'm ready to use my words solely for His glory and to win others to His kingdom.

Writers Need a Sabbath

Photo by Debby Hudson on Unsplash

My laptop was in the shop for repairs all last week. As the one device in our home with Microsoft Word, it's the only place I can work on my novels. This evoked mixed feelings. Even though the inability to work on my writing brought frustration, it also brought a whole different overwhelming feeling: a perplexing combination of relief and freedom. It lifted the weight of expectation. I didn't have to worry about my productivity level because it was out of my hands.

As a result, I'm now contemplating taking a breather from my writing efforts. I suppose I've become too consumed with the elusive goal of achieving publication. My January resolutions all leaned that direction. Mentally, I am constantly agitating over what I should do to achieve that goal. It is draining. Perhaps, I desperately need a writing hiatus. The writing loses the element of fun when expectation overshadows eagerness.

I will admit, this is rather unsettling, a month before my annual November Nanowrimo efforts. Even though I had already considered passing on this year's challenge, it feels too much like surrender. Then again, maybe surrender is exactly what I need at this moment. It is also scary because I think I see my writing as my raison d'etre (reason for existence). Without that as a focus, what do I do with myself? (My husband would say, "Clean, woman! Clean!" - ha!)

I long for feedback from other writers. Is this a normal patch in the road? Am I coming to the end of my writing reserves? Am I giving up by taking time off from my writing goals? How long should my hiatus last? If you are a writer, how do you handle the need for a break? Even God took a Sabbath rest after His creation. Should I wonder at my soul's need for a breather? Who knows, maybe a Sabbath is the key!

Another Nanowrimo Challenge Has Come and Gone

In some ways, this was the most frantic and chaotic one-month writing challenge I have experienced. In other ways, it was the most rewarding and easiest. Instead of having a full month to fulfill Nanowrimo's 50 thousand word goal, I left for my European excursion on the 1st day of the month and didn't muster focus or energy enough to begin until November 11th. With less than three weeks left to meet the word goal, I knew I'd have to write twice as many words as I usually accomplish in a given day (in past years, I've always reached for 2000 a day). Due to the intensity of the daily requirement, I gave up my usual morning brainstorming walks. Less exercise and cogitation, but more writing.

The whole impetus for my trip was research for a sequel to my Dream-catcher and the Frog-kisser young adult novel. That novel ends with two young college students preparing for a trip to London, Paris, and Rome. Somehow, despite chatting with the two young women I met on the trip (Isabelle and Katie who used the Groupon deal for a girlfriend trip, after Isabelle's husband was called away for military duty), I couldn't get the feel for the dynamics of the girlfriend angle. After all, the primary thrust of my experience was that I had tackled the travel challenge on my own. I thought about writing an inspirational women's novel about a woman who goes on a solo trip and finds the inner strength she thought she'd lost for good, but that idea fell flat as well. In the end, I kept coming back to something Linda had said about how many interesting experiences I had encountered in my life and that it would make a riveting travel memoir. And so, bending the Nanowrimo rules a bit - after all, it is supposed to be a fiction challenge - I set out to write my travel memoir.

I titled it, loosely, There and Back Again: How Travel Changed my Life. I'm not fond of that title now, but we'll see if I can improve upon it. By far, my favorite part of the writing experience (apart from actually taking the trip that led to the memoir), involved digging out my old journals from my high school and college years. In October of 1981, my high school creative writing teacher issued a journaling assignment that I latched onto with gusto. I took that first journal everywhere. I had my friends sign it. I gave it a name (indeed, the first six journals have names - Alden, Brandy, Chauncey, Durwyn, Edwin, and Farr - most of the names meaning "friend"). I poured out every experience, every emotion, every encounter. I kept them meticulously for a little over a decade, but I think my marital struggles derailed my journaling because it no longer felt safe to write down my deepest, darkest feelings in tangible form. In looking back over the endless pages of writing, I was stunned by the intensity of my feelings and the depth of my spiritual hunger.

I kept a faithful record of all those earliest travel experiences - my first plane ride, my first international flight, and my first missionary trip. Every day was filtered through the lens of my idealistic youthful eyes. As I read the journals, I set about capturing those moments a second time with more focus and purpose. Writing about things that have actually happened to you is far easier than coming up with actions for a fictional character to experience. The daily word goal of 4000 words didn't seem difficult at all (although I found it took more time than fiction writing, perhaps because I spent a fair amount reviewing past words in order to articulate the ideas in a fresh form).

In addition to the old journals, I had five memory albums to sift through. Two of the albums contained photos, old programs, and paraphernalia from high school and college. One highlighted my summer service corps term in the Philippines. The final two were from my England adventures - Wheaton-in-England, and then my six-month residency.

Thanks to a two-day writing retreat at the beloved Mahseh Center in Kewanna, Indiana, I was only 800 words away from the goal on November 22nd. I took two days off for Thanksgiving and came back with a little less intensity (only completing an average of 3000 words each day), but finished the month with 61,000 words and an almost-complete first draft. I'm working on the most important part now, the take-away chapter. If a memoir doesn't provide something for the reader to connect with and take away from its pages, it is just a catalog of events. I may slow down for this part, but in a few days I should be done and ready to put it away for two months to simmer (so I can come at it with fresh eyes for the lengthy, tedious rewriting process).

Book Review: Do the Work!

I should have really felt more energized by reading this book, Do the Work!, by Steven Pressfield. It is basically a manifesto to fight through resistance and get your dream goal completed (be that a novel, an opera, a new business, whatever). Certainly I could use a swift kick in the pants to get busy finishing the novel I started in November. But, it just felt like a pointless pep talk. Indeed, I have already heard all these sentiments before. If there's something good that you should be doing, know that the cosmos will conspire against you and try to hold you back. Press on! Never give up! Sit butt in chair and show up! Stop worrying about whether it is good and just begin to get it down. Some progress is better than no progress at all, what happens when you're too bent on planning the progress out in detail.

Don't get me wrong. These are all good messages. I myself needed the swift kick in the pants that came in the form of Nanowrimo many years back, when I finally began finishing novels. Perhaps that is where you are. Perhaps you need this message to just get off your duff and BEGIN. To do the work. If so, I can guarantee you'll get through it quickly (the book, that is - not necessarily your goal/dream). Just, for me, it was old news rehashed.

Back Up, Start Over

When I last wrote about my novel writing venture in November, things were going splendidly. I had completed Part One of the current novel and had entered into the waters of Part Two. I had met the Nanowrimo goal of 50,000 words for the one month time period. Everything was swimming along.

Then came Thanksgiving. I'm sure there are a myriad of reasons why a holiday can throw your writing mojo into the gutter. I wasn't even responsible for the meal, thanks to my hubby's willingness to do the cooking. I feel like I have no excuse, yet the writing started to creep along at a horrifying pace. First, I stopped meeting my 2000 word-a-day goal. Then, during the height of the holiday, I had four different zero word days (groan). Over the last two weeks, I've only squeaked out 14,576 words.

Even more concerning, it just felt like the second portion of the novel wasn't clear in my mind. The characters felt wrong. The agent for resolution was too complicated (led into territory where I couldn't really research the answers to questions on-line but would need more specialized knowledge). It makes sense that the first half was the easier section to write. It is far more challenging to write healing than it is to bleed pain onto the page. Still, I was growing quite disillusioned. I spent inordinate amounts of time researching location and setting details and while those are important, they were getting in the way of real writing.

Then, yesterday morning, as I was mulling over the difficulties again, I had a revelation of sorts. I had always envisioned the key secondary character in Part Two as a young girl named Dakota. When she appeared at all (and I wasn't seeing her very clearly), she had a widowed father in her life and the parent was getting in the way. As I thought about it more, I realized that perhaps she is not a young girl, but is rather a teenage runaway, named Savannah, that the main character believes to be a neighbor. This scenario provides its own challenges and again, I may be in over my head. But, even though I'm still a bit hazy on the details, I'm pretty sure that I need to back up and start over. I plan to scrap almost all of the work done in the past two weeks and begin again on Monday (when I can focus clearly on the writing without boys underfoot), rewriting Part Two.

If there is any consolation in all of this, it is that I am very pleased with the first half of the novel. It has set the stage for the second half quite well and established character, dilemma, conflict, and an even story arc. Sadly, the days are growing colder and my morning walks have become more difficult to accomplish. I work best when I have that time to ponder the characters and their individual needs. Plus, I use that time to pray and offer up my minimal talents to be used as the Lord sees fit (praying that He would multiply my loaves and fishes). So, as I plow into December and a new start to the second half of my novel, I'm hoping for two solid weeks of intense focus and productivity while the boys finish up their last full weeks of school before the winter break arrives. Goodbye Dakota. Hello Savannah.

Blessed by Another Writing Retreat

This week, I was privileged with the opportunity to get away for my third writing retreat. For the second year in a row, my husband has encouraged me to slip away for several days to an idyllic retreat center in Northern Indiana (my first one had been to a small cabin in Southern Indiana and it was so small and isolated that I had no Internet connection there - sometimes Internet comes in handy to research something that comes up in the writing).

What a blessing those days turned out to be!

The retreat center is basically a stunning house on Lake Bruce. Last year, I spent more time writing in a location where I could physically look out on the serene scene of the water (for photos of the suite and the desk where I wrote looking out on the water, see last year's retreat post):

This year, I holed up in the Francis Schaeffer Suite and wrote furiously without viewing the water. The first day, I managed to get in 4,610 words, even though I didn't arrive until late afternoon. The second day, I woke at 5:30 and was basically a whirling dervish of words for twelve hours, spilling out another 8,488 words. When I woke on the third day there, I hit a blockage, not knowing where to send the story from that point. So, I did what I always do when I'm stuck ... I took a walk, which included a brief visit to a small prayer chapel on the property:

I thought the words above the prayer chapel and inside were perfect for the piece on spiritual redemption that I am working on: The front of the chapel says "Be still and know that I am God," while the inside bears a verse from Psalm 62:8 - "Trust in him at all times, you people, pour out your hearts to Him, for God is our refuge."

On the wall, I found this telling plaque with more words to spur on my writing about brokenness and redemption:

It reads: "The spirit of the Lord is upon me because the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the afflicted; He has sent me to bind up the broken-hearted, to proclaim liberty to captives and freedom to prisoners." - Isaiah 61:1

How appropriate, since my character is deeply broken and in need of a healing, restorative touch.

I was shocked when on the last day, a new character pushed her way into the scene ... someone I had not anticipated playing a part in the story. That day, I managed 3689 words, which brought me to over 21 thousand words for my retreat and pushed me into the winner's circle for the Nanowrimo effort by making my word count 50,539. Yippee!

To celebrate my productivity, I watched a movie in the spacious movie room in the basement on the last night. The screen covers almost the whole wall ... it was like having my own private theater.

My youngest, Sean, had quite a tough time in my absence and called me every afternoon/evening, begging me to come home early. I am a short way into Part Two of the novel and am guessing that I still have another 30 or 40 thousand words to write, but am thrilled to have made such good progress while I was gone.

Goodbye October, Hello November

This feels like the calm before the storm. The boys are out trick-or-treating with their dad and I'm sitting here ruminating over what I should write about for my upcoming Nanowrimo effort. This will be my eighth year of writing a book during the month of November. Seven times I've accomplished not only the 50,000 words-in-a-month challenge, but also the completion of each manuscript. My prayer is that I be successful again, but we shall see.

Here are the boys in all their crazy glory:

The amazing thing is that they didn't request gruesome costumes this year. A peeled banana and a homeless man! Can't get much tamer than that!

Let the festivities begin:

Pitchapalooza 2016

Nanowrimo (National Novel Writing Month) helped me turn a corner as a writer. Once I joined in the annual November festivities of attempting to write 50,000 words of a novel in one month's time, I released my inner editor and actually began finishing manuscripts instead of writing three or four chapters and then abandoning the work when the next idea took hold. It was like a gate opened up at the races and I poured out of it determined to cross the finish line.

When a writer completes the 50,000 word goal (and most of the time, for me that is only part-way to the end of the manuscript, so I often write into December until that first draft is completed), Nanowrimo sends out alerts of various winner offers. This year, one of the offers jumped out at me. It was a pitching contest called Pitchapalooza, presented by The Book Doctors, the husband and wife team of Arielle Eckstut and David Henry Sterry.

You are only allowed 250 words or less, so I hammered and honed a pitch for my most recent Nanowrimo effort, my YA novel entitled The Probability Code, and sent it off. The Book Doctors review the pitches and randomly select 25 to critique on their website. Writers are encouraged to visit the site, review the pitches and critiques, and then vote for their favorite one. The popular vote is announced and The Book Doctors also select their favorite. The popular vote winner receives a free one hour consultation with The Book Doctors and the top winner is introduced to a publisher/agent who is a fit for that particular pitch. It is a great opportunity to learn about pitching your work (enticing an agent or publisher to read your whole manuscript).

This year there were 758 entries. Sadly, my pitch was not randomly selected for critique. But, there was another offer. If you purchase The Book Doctors' book, The Essential Guide to Getting Your Book Published: How to Write It, Sell It, and Market It ... Successfully, and present evidence of the purchase, you will receive a free twenty minute consultation with The Book Doctors, worth $100. Knowing the chance was slim that my pitch would be randomly selected for critique, I opted to buy the book.

Today was my consultation with The Book Doctors and, although the time went very quickly, I was able to present my pitch for The Probability Code and to receive David Sterry's opinions on its viability. Here is my pitch:

"For fourteen-year-old Kamal Malone life is anything but easy. While everything seems to drop into place for her older sister, Cosmos, for Kamal, just going to school fills her heart with dread. Besieged by social anxiety, walking through the crowded halls of her high school produces the same adrenaline rush most people experience during the running of the bulls. Only for Kamal, it is simply terrifying with none of the excitement factor.

"And now, thanks to the Population Control Council, Kamal's anxiety is at a fever pitch. Due to the perfect storm of food, water, and energy shortages, the Council has instituted the Probability Code Exam. This exam is supposed to determine an individual's probability of societal success. Cosmos passed the exam with ease the previous Spring, but now Kamal's name is on the list and seeing her name there brings on a full-blown panic attack.

"Those with the highest scores are culled to work in the Nurturing Program, flooding genetically rich infants with stimulation to encourage brain development. Thus, Cosmos is paired with the handsome and intelligent Ned Finnegan to work with Clay Taylor. But those who score in the lower ten percent on the exam will be shipped off to segregation communities with minimal resources. Will Kamal's test anxiety keep her from revealing her true potential? Can Cosmos and Ned help Kamal fight the anxieties that hold her hostage? If she doesn't pass the exam, how will she possibly handle life in the mysterious segregation community?"

Here was the primary observation David offered me: The pitch is telling ideas but not presenting actions. I need to make the reader root for the character more and get more inside the character's mind and emotions. Thus, I offered to read to David the first paragraph of the novel itself:

"She would die of a heart attack right there on the locker room floor. She wouldn't even be allowed to die alone. No. It would have to happen right there with Penny Schumacher standing at her locker staring at her, open-mouthed, as she crawled along on the floor gasping for breath, trying to ease the painful throb deep in her chest."

He seemed very pleased with that snippet, announcing that it revealed good writing, an enticing voice, and the full range of emotions presented so that he could actually feel what the character was feeling. He encouraged me to rework the pitch so that I condensed the action and emotion of that first paragraph of the actual novel into a nugget. He reminded me to think of the pitch as a movie trailer, presenting a scene economically and then pulling back to present the world the character is inhabiting and the obstacles she faces. I simply need to show it more clearly, instead of telling the ideas behind the novel. Once I rework the pitch, he encouraged me to road test it by sending it out to ten people. He suggested that I join the SCBWI (Society of Children's Book Writers and Illustrators), where I can meet others who could provide me with valuable feedback and also come in contact with editors who might be enticed by my pitch.

All in all, it was a very encouraging and beneficial critique session. He seemed to feel that my idea was a solid one, worth devoting the time and energy to refine and pursue. He said that my first paragraph revealed what he felt would probably be the ability to pull off the ideas presented in the pitch. Best of all, he offered to accept further correspondence (I know he was under no obligation to give me another moment of his time) when I have refined the pitch. He believes he knows several appropriate agents he might pass the pitch along to for consideration. That was really encouraging. Oftentimes in the publishing world, you need to find that someone who knows someone who might be interested in reviewing your work. Connections can be key.

Now, I have several goals before me. I need to finish a few revisions of the novel to make it the best possible manuscript it can be. I need to rework the pitch to provide more action and entice more with the character's emotional response to the conflict. I need to find a few beta readers for the revised manuscript and find ten people to review the revised pitch. And, I agree that I should probably join the SCBWI (where some of those readers might be waiting).

This encouraging consultation came at just the right time. A few weeks ago, I finally heard back from the agent who had requested my If Bones Could Speak manuscript almost a year ago. He wrote: "after some deliberation I've decided your work just isn't quite right for me.  As I'm sure you know, whether or not to take on a client is a very personal decision, and has as much to do with an agent's personal preferences as it does an author's writing abilities."

I will admit, it was discouraging to hear that this agent wasn't a good fit for representation of my manuscript. I had to fight those inner demons yelling, "Just give up. Just quit writing. You obviously aren't any good at this and nobody is ever going to say yes." Now I can fight back against those defeatist attitudes with the encouragement from David Sterry. He seemed to think my manuscript holds great promise. He believes in it enough to offer to pass my work on to someone who might bite (after I revise the pitch further, of course). The hard work will be in getting it polished to the point where I don't believe I can polish it further and learning how to present the best pitch possible (although I do feel I'm not far off because I've enticed two agents and two editors to request my manuscripts based on previous pitches/queries).

If you are a writer you might consider checking out The Book Doctors' book and free consultation offer. Moreover, they are holding a free webinar tomorrow. The links for that are found on their website. As for me, I'm hoping I can listen in so that I can glean even more wisdom about presenting the perfect pitch and pursuing publication for my writing.

Another Nanowrimo Begins

Once again, I'm pulling away from the dock of fear and insecurity and attempting to write at least 50,000 words of a novel during the month of November. I kept hoping I would get some grand idea for a women's novel (since that would be easier to market to agents/publishers), but alas, all I could come up with was another YA idea.

I woke at 4:40 this a.m. (thanks to the time change) and set right in. For now, I have written 2,607 words toward the goal. I have been walking on the high school track (instead of listening to book on CD while walking on the treadmill) in order to ruminate on my initial idea for a novel entitled The Probability Code. I don't really wish to elaborate on the story line at this point, but I will say that I'm hoping to enter the YA Discovery contest with the first 250 words of the story.

Do you realize how hard it is to write an enticing opening in just 250 words? You have to establish character, place, inciting incident and voice in such a small window of words. Wow! When I entered this contest before, I think they allowed you the first 500 words, but when I went to the website and saw this smaller word count, I wanted to give up before I even started. But, it is worth a shot, even if it feels like a shot in the dark.

In the meantime, I have several cheerleaders in my court on Facebook. It is helpful to commit to it up front and have people holding you accountable for your progress. It would be even better if I had another writer writing alongside me, to gauge word counts against and to spur me on to greater productivity. But, I will plug away without a companion writer and will hopefully end the month with another novel written and another certificate won from the National Novel Writing Month website, congratulating me on a job well done. That's the goal, anyway. We'll see if it all pens out [get it? pens/pans - ha].

Nanowrimo Winner 2014

I can check off Nanowrimo Number Six. I completed the final words on my Nanowrimo manuscript on Friday morning, topping the manuscript out at 51,824 words. I am very happy with how it turned out and really can't wait to dig in for the revision stages (although I will put it off for at least six weeks in order to approach the manuscript with fresh eyes).

I also recently took one of my YA manuscripts to a member of my Young Adult book club for her review. She came back with wonderful comments, saying I really caused the action to come alive in her head and that she truly fell in love with my main character. She said that I nailed the voice of the male narrator well. She added that she hopes I plan on working on a sequel to that novel (something I haven't considered and don't know if I will because I, myself, don't see the main character further along than where his trials have taken him thus far).

Now, I can relax and enjoy the holidays, knowing I have another rough draft manuscript to return to in the new year. My friend Anne has written two more children's books and I agreed to be a member of her launch team for each of them. I finally feel like I have time to devote to reading her manuscripts and providing some feedback and reviews for her. Let the holiday shopping, Christmas card sending, house cleaning and decorating begin! I'm in a good spot for it! Plus, there's a present in the mail, since I ordered a Nanowrimo winner t-shirt before I even completed the challenge (I was pretty sure I could do it again).

Nanowrimo - Half Way In

Yesterday morning, I made it to the halfway point in my November book. I surpassed 25,000 words. Of course, this doesn't mean the book is halfway done because I always try to keep writing clear to the final word, which almost always is well beyond the 50,000 word goal. But, still, I feel encouraged that it is going so well.

I'm going to try to have another 4000 word day today because I know I will be gone for much of the morning and afternoon tomorrow. I'll be playing my horn with a small ensemble to kick off The Salvation Army's kettle campaign in Indianapolis. It is supposed to be cold, so I hope my horn valves don't freeze up. I have purchased hand and foot warmers because I remember how cold my feet were last year.

I'm finding my morning walks around the high school track to be especially productive. I have resumed that practice and left off walking on the treadmill while listening to books. Thus, due to the writing and track-walking, I haven't been getting in as much reading. Still, I'm close to finishing one book and halfway through another.

Nanowrimo - One Fifth In

I am one fifth of the way through in my goal to write 50,000 words this month. I have been trying to write 2000 words a day, but managed to crank out 4,300 today. I guess I just hit a flow point. Having done this before, I know that the beginning often takes off well and then you hit the middle and begin to lose steam. We shall see how it goes.

While I'm not overly thrilled with what I've written so far (it rambles a bit and lacks focus), I haven't had trouble knowing what to write about, so that is good. I don't really know what to call it. It is fiction based on personal experience. I think I've nailed the voice, but not the structure yet. Thankfully, the blessing of Nanowrimo is getting the words down and worrying about structure and refinement at a later date. If you are participating in Nanowrimo, I wish you all the best. It was instrumental in helping me to finally finish a manuscript (after years of starting and then abandoning projects). Viva la Nanowrimo!

Nanowrimo Approaches

It's that time of year again. The time when I settle down all my writing energies and focus on churning out another book. I've done it five times before and have been fairly satisfied with my results. This year, however, I'm approaching it with the most trepidation I've felt yet. There are many reasons for my hesitation and angst.

To begin with, I have no idea what to focus on this time around. Since I'm struggling with finding an interested market for my Christian young adult fiction, I believe I should shift my focus to something else. Women's fiction is probably the best bet for a wider market, in terms of finding an agent and getting the manuscript read. But, I haven't come up with an idea for a story or a character to launch a story. Nata. Zilch. Nothing! Even though I've been in that position before, late in October, on the verge of the writing month, it is still an unsettling place to be.

Then there's another option. I have been toying with working on a memoir. The only problem with this is that the memoir, while primarily about me and the struggles I have faced in a particular area of life, necessarily involves other people. By nature of being on the periphery of my life, they fall into the story and I'm not sure how to handle that. No doubt they would like their lives to remain private, even if I am willing to bare my soul about an important, complex life issue. Plus, while it would be great writing practice, part of me thinks that such an endeavor would end up merely being a therapeutic venture with little prospect of future publication.

I actually started another young adult novel outside of the Nanowrimo month, but I don't think I have enough skill to pull off the story. It is a thriller based on a contemporary what-if question. Even if I think it holds merit and would not necessarily end up being in the narrow "Christian" market, it feels too difficult to pull off. I don't think I have what it takes to make the story well-rounded and consistently gripping.

In searching for an agent to pitch, I have come across loads of specific information about what agents are eager to see. None of what I write tends to appeal to those dramatic interests. I don't write paranormal. I don't write dystopian. My books seem too lame for the present market. Aren't there young adults out there looking for morally wholesome literature with a good story line and interesting characters? Apparently not. Apparently, they all want some new futuristic, gimmicky plot-line. Thus, I'm feeling down about my writing and that is never a good state to be in before launching into writing another book.

Moreover, I'm feeling the added external pressure of my husband's desire for me to abandon this dream. He doesn't word it like that, of course. But, he has said that "if this next book doesn't find an interested reader, perhaps it is time to look for a job and help out financially." Obviously, I'm aware that my writing hasn't panned out to a single cent of remuneration. I'm not really interested in the financial aspect. But, with his desire for me to give up, it makes it harder for my own sentiments to remain steadfast.

Finally, we're throwing another wrench into the mix because we've decided (me grudgingly) to go ahead and get the boys another dog (this time much smaller than our last dog). I don't know how much this will factor into the equation. Will my attention be diverted? Will I have to be responsible for the lion's share of training and acclimating our new pet? Who knows? It is something I definitely don't feel equipped for and something I certainly don't relish experiencing. Maybe I should write a novel about a woman who dreads getting a dog but desperately believes that every boy should experience the benefit of growing up with a dog. Ha!

What sort of book are you interested in finding or reading? Do you have any bones you could throw me to trigger an idea for a story? Do you have any advice for a new, reluctant pet owner? Any and all feedback would be appreciated.

Book Review: The Forest for the Trees

The Forest for the Trees was a different sort of book for writers. Written by an editor, Betsy Lerner, it addresses the temperaments and propensities of writers. It isn't a how-to book. It is more of a reflective book about what writers go through and what editors think of the writing process. I thought it was very refreshing. Thank you, Sheila of The Deliberate Reader, for bringing this book to my attention.

The thing I gained most from this book was encouragement. Writers often get to the point where they want to just give up because their work isn't gaining the audience they desire.  Lerner writes at the outset, "It is my deepest hope that this book will offer helpful advice to beginning writers, but even more that it will inspire the late bloomers, those who have worked in fits and starts over the years but have never just quit or given up the dream completely. This is also a book for people who sometimes believe the worst about themselves when it comes to their writing..." Those words hit me square in the head.

I think self-doubt and rejection are the hardest aspects of writing that writers have to deal with. The author quotes another editor, Ted Solotaroff, who writes this apt analogy in his essay, "Writing in the Cold":

"Rejection along with uncertainty are as much a part of the writer's life as snow and cold are of an Eskimo's: they are conditions one has not only to learn to live with but also learn to make use of .... The gifted young writer has to learn that his main task is to persist."

For me, this was just the encouragement I needed to hear as I approach another Nanowrimo in November. I have no idea what I'm going to write about, but I know that I am going to attempt to shift out of my comfortable mode (writing young adult novels) into something which may stretch me but also may provide a wider door to publication (writing women's fiction). I have enough self-doubt to sink a ship. I go back and forth over the question of whether I should just give up on this dream or relegate it to the back burner and seek out employment instead of pouring myself into writing which never yields much in the way of results. Even when I give my novels away to others to read and provide feedback, I seem to wait months before I hear a word back (not an encouraging sign, but my husband asserts that it could be just a matter of the other person not having time to read it yet).

As Lerner forcefully asserts: "the only person whose rejection really counts is your own. No matter how many people return your work, the only one who can send you packing is yourself."

So if you are a writer plagued with self-doubt and ready to throw in the towel. Don't give up yet. Read this book about what editors are looking for and how editors perceive a writer. Read it for wisdom. Read it for encouragement. Read it as a lifeline when you think you might sink into the abyss.

The Winner's Certificate

I completed my Nanowrimo novel this year on November 20th, but didn't sign in to validate it until today. So, I just downloaded my nifty little certificate which proves that I completed the goal. My boys always scoff at this motivation. The certificate is an honor I'll gladly accept. The Nano people informed me that out of more than 300,000 people who signed up for Nanowrimo this year, only 41,940 people were winners, and I'm one of them!

Normally, they offer a winner's badge by now, but I couldn't find one, so here's what my certificate looks like:

In the meantime, my silence hasn't been due to editing or revising (I usually let the novel sit for at least a few weeks to provide some space), but rather because I have been abandoning books left and right lately.  It is really quite remarkable. I've read about 50 to 100 pages in and then, just decided I didn't feel like reading it right now after all. Sob.

Here's a list of the ones I can remember setting aside:

Regine's Book: A Teen Girl's Last Words by Regine Stokke (this book is about a girl who faces, and eventually succumbs to, leukemia) - just too darn sad. Couldn't keep reading, although the photography in the book was stunning and the story probably worthwhile, if you can get beyond the sadness factor.

Masterminds and Wingmen: Helping Our Boys Cope with Schoolyard Power, Locker-Room Tests, Girlfriends, and the New Rules of Boy World by Rosalind Wiseman - while this would be a great book for a mother with boys to read, I just couldn't get into it this time (perhaps because I'm not having any great difficulties with my boys which require seeking assistance). Maybe I'll pick it up again some day.

Runaway Emotions: Why You Feel the Way You Do and What God Wants You to Do About It by Jeff Shreve - again, just didn't feel like this book at this time (ironic, no?).

The Girl You Left Behind by JoJo Moyes - this book received stellar reviews, so I might pick it up again, but I hadn't gotten very far in before the hold list recalled the book and I couldn't renew it (sob).

At the moment, I am about 35 pages into two books, which again haven't totally hooked me yet:

It Happened at the Fair by Deeann Gist and After the Rain by Karen White.

The Potential of First Drafts

Throughout the whole Nanowrimo process, I have a tendency to beat myself up for the perceived weaknesses of my new manuscript. The errors and flaws jump out at me. I worry that the piece is really worth nothing and a waste of time.  I think, "Will I have spent all of November, pouring out words for a manuscript that is too hokey, not engaging enough, riddled with too many characters and not enough suspense?"

I receive e-mails from the Gotham Writer's Workshop in New York.  They always provide good encouragement for writers and valid things to think about.  But, recently, Kelly Caldwell, their Dean of Faculty, wrote up a piece about first drafts.  These were words I needed to hear.  My rough draft might be rough and have tons of holes and weaknesses, but there are also things of great value there.  Even if it might not look like it on the surface, there are elements which, once mined and refined, will yield a good story.  She writes:

 "As everyone from Anne Lamott to William Zinnser, from Julia Cameron to Walter Mosley has told us, writing is a miraculous blend of the subconscious and the conscious. Our subconscious mind works away at our stories, and in our first (and second and third) drafts, we tap it, as miners tap veins within rock, to unlock its treasures. In revision, we bring our conscious minds to the effort, thinking about and experimenting with our structure, our themes, our words.

"Most gems do not emerge from the earth smooth and sparkly. Some natural gemstones must be hammered and cut to release their precious cargo; some are washed in cyanide, or bathed in pearl essence. Before any of that, miners must identify which lumps of rock will yield precious gems, and which are just rocks....

"Clichés, repetitions, elliptical descriptions, themes that just won’t quit, characters who won’t go away – on the surface, in our rough drafts, they can look like just so much bad writing. But on second look, we need to evaluate them with some care, and dispassion. Sometimes they are, or they point to, natural gemstones, that with excavating, cutting, and polishing, become precious."

As I pray that my "bad writing" will turn into something of value with revision and digging, I offer up to you, fellow writer, this encouragement as well.  Don't chuck your first draft.  Don't belittle your efforts.  Remember, you cannot see what wealth is hidden beneath the surface.  There is a reason your story needs to see the light of day. Just keep plugging away until that story is presentable and the great potential has been fully tapped. Your future reader will thank you for not giving up too soon.

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As of 11/15, I am 45,334 words into the Nanowrimo goal. Not bad progress at all!

Nano Progress and Tidbits

I am cooking along on the novels.  I still am not thrilled with my efforts (worry that the story is a bit too smarmy, the stakes not high enough, and the story not interesting enough to hold a reader), but I keep reminding myself that it is a first draft.  All of these weaknesses can be addressed during the numerous editing stages the manuscript will go through after the Nanowrimo challenge is done.

The novel holding my primary focus is called "The Golden Bobby Pin" and is about a terribly shy, self-conscious teen who finds a golden bobby pin and decides to wear it in her hair.  She finds that when she wears the pin, good things happen and her self-confidence increases.  She becomes convinced that it bears some magic, despite her best friend's skepticism. Eventually, the pin will disappear and she will have to determine whether the confidence comes from within or from the pin.  As my niece puts it, it's a feel-good novel.  Not intense story-line, like some of my others.

The second novel I started is called "Dethroning the Queen of Sheba." This is one I began many years ago, so the story line has had a good long time to simmer.  However, somehow my enthusiasm for the tale is lagging, even though I think it holds more promise than the somewhat unbelievable bobby pin story. I suppose part of it is that I really liked the beginning I wrote before and cannot find it anywhere in my papers (although I know I never would have thrown it out - it is there somewhere).

It is about a teen who is forced to spend the summer with her prissy younger sister at her grandmother's house.  She decides to bring her sister down a peg by sending her fake anonymous love letters.  She is unsettled when someone else begins sending real letters.  Who is sending the real letters and will the older sister end up being the one who is brought down a peg instead? It just isn't coming as smoothly as the other tale, for now.  I still write about a thousand words on it, every other day.

So, on November 8th, I achieved the mid-way point of the Nanowrimo goal - achieving 25,000 words. I tend to average about 3600 words on days when the boys are not home and 1500 words when they are home.  This is still not enough to make 100,000 words by the end of the month, but I'm hoping I will at least complete the bobby pin novel entirely.

In other news, my son's football team lost their sectional game on Friday.  It was not unexpected, but still a bit of a disappointment (equally disappointing because we didn't get to see it as planned - we drove all the way out to the venue, only to find that there were no parking spaces left - the game was mobbed and Bryce said even if we had parked in a store parking lot across the street, we would have even struggled to find standing room). I did manage to snag a photo of him in his game jersey prior to leaving for school on Friday morning:

Plus, I realized that I failed to post a photo of my younger sons dressed in their Halloween attire this year.  So here is a photo of my skateboarding zombie and my Scream character:

Pardon my Silence While I'm Busy Writing a Novel

Every November since November of 2009, I have participated in National Novel Writing Month (Nanowrimo).  Every year, I've completed the necessary 50,000 words to receive my prize - something my boys scoff at - the coveted certificate.  It really isn't just a certificate I've won.  I've won more confidence in my writing.

And, I suppose I am either a lot more confident this year or just determined to make things more interesting and difficult, because when it came time to start the novel, I couldn't decide between two warring ideas swirling in my head.  So, I decided it wouldn't hurt to start them both and let time determine which one I felt like working more diligently on.  I figure I can combine the word count, since they are both going to be tangible novels in the end (I would hope).  Thus, I started Day One with 2281 words on one manuscript and 1264 words on the other.  So far, one novel is outpacing the other one.  I now have 10,503 words on the more preferred story line and 2952 on the other one.  I still haven't decided if I will ditch the second one or up the ante and try to accomplish 50,000 words on both of them, arriving at a total word count of 100,000.  That sounds intimidating, but I'm eager to give it a shot.  What do I have to lose?  Any words I write are more than I would have had if I had neglected to attempt Nanowrimo again.

Regardless of what happens, I am happy to say that I am 1/5 of the way through the challenge.  I will probably not be on to blog as frequently, since I set my goal rather high.  Thank you for your patience and be sure to check in from time to time just in case I snag a moment or manage to read a book (after all, I still have my November book club book to read). If you are doing Nanowrimo, leave a comment.  I'd love to feel a sense of solidarity with another writer.