An Attitude Adjustment

Sometimes I'm a grumbler. Yes, it's true. I will freely admit that about myself. I can get my head pointed in one direction and if that direction is tampered with, well ... I get my panties in a bind. Most of the time, it is my own misconception of what is expected of me which helps to hoist those panties higher.

So, why exactly did I need an attitude adjustment today?? Well, last Friday was the very first Friday when both of my little boys attended preschool or Parent's Day Out for the full day. Yes, indeed! This year, they will be attending from 9-3 on Fridays. Woo-hoo!

As we approached the start of the new school year, I made a private commitment to myself. I wanted to be sure this chunk of time didn't get absorbed in housework. While housework is important and even, a necessary evil, I determined to spend a large chunk of that kid-free zone actively pursuing publication of my writing.

The first Friday had already hit a few glitches, but turned out so well that I contemplated writing a post asserting my new favorite day of the week as Friday. My husband had recognized that this was a kid-free zone as well. He has Fridays off work. Therefore, he sized up the situation and asked if we could do lunch and a run to Lowe's to look for a new kitchen sink.

There was no way in the world I was going to turn to my husband and declare that I intended to spend my entire Friday pursuing publication instead of spending quality one-on-one couple time.

We had a wonderful date after I spent most of the morning at the library researching possible publishing companies for one of my children's books.

This week, we have been battling colds. MS missed a day of preschool on Monday and YS and I both caught the bug by Wednesday. Yesterday, I felt so horrible that I took to bed in the afternoon, leaving the little boys to their own devices (surely ES couldn't leave his drums to supervise their play!). They had trashed the house and I went to bed as soon as their heads hit the pillow.

This morning, I discovered that my husband's brother was on his way over to trim the creek bank. My first thought was to rue the demise of my dedicated writing time. Indeed, I jumped to the conclusion that he would be coming into the house for lunch and possibly dinner. Therefore, my entire Friday would be spent cleaning when I had vowed that I would not cave in to that demand.

Oh, the battle which waged in my mind. This house belongs to my in-laws. If my brother-in-law were to come inside and see the state of the house (after several sick days), he would be appalled and he would pass this sentiment on to my mother-in-law. I could barely breathe from the panties around my neck. (Really, why do I care so much what others think?)

But, somehow, I began to think about my father-in-law. Indeed, I'm pretty sure that he's the one who set this plan in motion. He had already attempted to hire someone to come do the job, but it was as high on that individual's agenda as it has been on our agenda.

Personally, I'm not really sure what is called for. I have never lived out in the country before and I've never been responsible for the up-keep of a home. When I look at the creek bank, I tend to think that nature intended that overgrowth. Plus, given the fact that so many local yokels toss trash onto the side of our property, I'm not convinced that others around us are concerned about the state of the creek-bank.

However, my father-in-law is. In his healthier days, he would spend hours trimming the creek bank. Once, he even tried to take the tractor mower down there. The creek bank holds such an angle that the tractor tipped over on top of him (this was when he was already in his seventies), until he and my mother-in-law were able to right it. (Not only are my in-laws neat and tidy; they are also feisty.)

As I thought about my father-in-law, I reminded myself that there aren't many things he can do any more. He can't get down and weed-eat the creek bank himself, even if he would like to. In his hey-day, he was an eminent professor of business at the University of Illinois. How difficult it must be to spend his days riddled with pain and be unable to do the things he desires.

Slowly, my interrupted plans seemed petty. If my brother-in-law was willing to give up a day of his life to make my father-in-law happy, who was I to stand in the way? My brother-in-law is quite a hard worker. He would certainly do a fine job of it and would even welcome the labor.

I did scurry around a bit, trying to tidy things. I took my brother-in-law a tall glass of water and thanked him for the hard work. I even baked a loaf of banana chocolate-chip bread and sent half of the loaf home with him.

It turned out, he wouldn't come in the house (doesn't that always seem to follow my neurotic anxiety episodes??). He was fairly sweaty and insisted that he didn't need any lunch. He stayed long enough for my little boys (who absolutely adore him) to see him and then he headed back home.

I didn't manage to snag more than an hour for my writing research, but it was still a grand Friday. And, my attitude has changed towards the weed-eating job as well. Tonight, as I stood at the kitchen window, I saw the full-winged flight of another blue heron across the creek. It was such a beautiful thing.

Not ten minutes later, I noticed another blue heron in the creek. I called the little boys and we set about watching it (darn my dead camera battery). I noted to my husband that we wouldn't have been able to see the heron if his brother hadn't worked so hard. As we stood there watching, my eyes were trained on the heron. But, MS was watching the entire creek and he suddenly piped up, "Hey, there's a fox, too." We watched a coyote climb up the creek bank and walk along the back of our yard towards the woods.

Now, I'm headed off to bed (before I aggravate my cold) thankful that my father-in-law insisted on the weed-eating job, thankful that my brother-in-law came over and gave my father-in-law some small bit of happiness, thankful that we were able to see the heron and the coyote and thankful that my house is clean. Just another day in paradise. No need to get my panties in a bind.