Thursday, February 14, 2008

Grateful for His Love

Today is Valentine's Day and I had failed to purchase a card for my husband until this morning. I guess I thought I would do it earlier this week, but then got sidetracked with a sick baby. So, this morning, after dropping my MS off at PDO (Parent's Day Out), I rushed into the store to purchase more acetaminaphin and a card. In trying to get the baby back in the van quickly, I stepped in to secure his car seat straps and managed to secure my foot on the strap of my purse. As I exited the van, my purse tipped over, spilling the contents into a dirty, slushy puddle of snow on the ground.

Immediately, I was hunched over grieving the loss because my travel Bible fell apart and into the puddle. As I scrambled to pick up the various pieces (and a few photos I always keep tucked inside it), I began to realize that several other things had fallen out also and were blowing away in the wind. An appointment card for the YS's next immunizations, a receipt and ... no, it can't be ... money. I ran to the other side of the van and quickly siezed two twenty dollar bills and another one dollar bill. Let me tell you, my first thought was of my husband!

I can honestly say that it hasn't always been easy to purchase a Valentine's card. When my ES was a toddler, my husband and I separated for about a year and a half. We sought counselling (British spelling here!) and worked hard on the issues in our relationship. It was a very difficult road. And, I can remember standing in stores wondering where I'd find a card that said "we're not doin' so well right now, but we just keep pluggin' along," or "some days you really make me angry, but I'm still trying to love you." At that time, I sought out the most generic one possible and wrote out some of what I was feeling.

This year, thankfully, I could have really looked for the mushy, grateful ones. That is, if I didn't have a cranky, feverish infant in hand. Alas, he will have to receive a card that was quick and easy and not one I anquished over to find the exact right sentiment.

But, I can truly say that I feel more and more love and gratitude for my husband as the years go by. Here are some of the reasons I love my husband:
  1. He is a thinker and makes me think more deeply about things.
  2. He loves books almost as much as I do.
  3. He is a musician.
  4. He loves God and believes that His rules aren't to restrict us, but to help us grow and receive His very best for us.
  5. He takes time to play and really connect with our sons.
  6. He has very high ideals.
  7. He is organized and efficient.
  8. He challenges me to be better than I am.
  9. He admits to his flaws and failings.
  10. He loves me in spite of my flaws and failings.

You see, the reason I thought of him as soon as I saw the money flying is because he has often asked me to be more careful with my money. I have such a tendency, when in a hurry, to tuck it back into my purse without enclosing it into my wallet. Sometimes, I stuff it into my pockets and then place it on my dresser, intending to shift it to the pockets of tomorrow's pants. My husband will scoop up the money or change and put it away (often in his own coffers, thank you). But, thankfully, he is gracious. He knows that this is one of my many weaknesses and he loves me in spite of it.

He cares for me when I get too sidetracked with the needs of our family to remember to take care of myself. He lets me know of his love and admiration. When I leave him home with the kids, he always makes a point of saying he doesn't know how I can do what I do day in and day out without pulling out my hair (my boys are very active and very demanding). I love him for who he is and for what he has brought to my life. I also love him for the ways he has forced me to grow. I love him for sticking with our relationship back when it seemed doomed. I love him for allowing time to meld us more together.

Now, he'd better read my blog, 'cause I don't know if I'll have time to write all this in my quickly-purchased card once the baby wakes from his nap. Ha!

4 comments:

chloe said...

I loved reading this...I love real people.

Guilty Secret said...

What a beautiful post!

I went through that thing with Baddie last year, wondering what you write in the card for Valentine's / anniversaries when things aren't going so well. How funny that we're both having the same Valentine's day this year, looking back to harder times whilst feeling so grateful that we got to where we are today.

Have a good one :)

Maria (also Bia) said...

Wendy,

Your post shows true "amore"! I hope your husband reads it. God bless, and have a Happy Valentine's Day!

Anonymous said...

Wendy, I read your blog yesterday, but wanted to stop back when I had time to comment. Your sentiment is beautiful. I was deeply touched. You are so blessed. It was year 3 for us that was most troublesome, but we waded through it and now its been 18+ years. I know what you mean about shopping for cards when the sentiments don't match how you are feeling and so something generic to mark the day makes the most sense. My hubby is not good with cards or consistent. Sometimes he buys a beautiful card, sometimes he writes me a letter, sometimes he apologizes for not having the time but tells me he appreciates me, and one year--I got a post-it note with his sentiment stuck on my computer screen. I save them all! I also can relate to your purse chaos. My hubby gets on my case too about shoving receipts and money into my purse when in a rush rather than take the 10 seconds to neatly pack it away properly. Mind you, he is neither neat or well-organized--but notices my clutter spots. Perhaps he notices them more because by and large I am well-organized. I simply acknowledge his comment and remind him not to throw stones if he lives in a glass house. He's not mean about it, but it does bug me when I look at his areas of domain!! Ah...men. ~Karin